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View Full Version : Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me



GAC
10-09-2006, 06:52 AM
Whether it is being accident prone or just plan doing stupid stuff.... these guys have nothing on the GACster.

I spent 3 hours at the ER yesterday with 1st degree burns over most of my face (top layer of skin gone) and my left arm. My hair line is pushed back a bit too.

I was trying to get my push mower running, which hadn't been used since last year. It wouldn't fire. So I drained what gas was in there (figured it was bad), changed the plug and air filter. Still it wouldn't fire.

I had been using the pliable push prime button on the side, but didn't smell gas, so I knew it couldn't be flooded. It seemed to me that it just wasn't getting any fire/spark from the plug. But I put a new plug in.

So I was trying everything. I decided to hold open the butterfly on the carb, to see if it was getting gas while my son hit the switch.

That is the last thing I remember.

How or what happened I do not know. And believe me, I've had plenty of time since yesterday running this situation through my mind, and trying to figure out what caused it.

But flames shot up into my face, and I wasn't directly over the carb either or it could have been worse, and the entire top of the lawnmower motor caught on fire. My wife (who was in the house) and the neighbor (who was out in his yard) said they heard an explosion. I didn't hear anything.... I just SAW. And it happened so fast, and I was on the ground.

My wife, when she heard it, immediately thought "What has the idiot done now?" .... she knows me folks. She's been married to me almost 25 years. ;)

I was in the far back part of the yard so she didn't see what had happened to me until I started getting closer to here. When she saw me, she just about had a heart attack. The pain wasn't that bad because I think I was going into shock.

Anyway, we got to the ER and I walked up to the counter and the nurse said "Can I help you?" Now folks, if you could see me, and believe me it's not a pretty sight - and some would say that even before the accident - why would anyone, especially an ER nurse say "Can I help you?" (implying what's wrong).

Since I seem to always use humor in almost every situation, I almost said "Yeah, I stubbed my toe!"

Finally, a couple more nurses came over, saw my situation, gasped, and said we are gonna have to clear a stall.

5 minutes later I see them wheeling out a guerney from a room, with what I am assuming is a body on it because the sheets were pulled up over the head.

I immediately thought to myself "I hope no one comes in after me!"

They immediately started putting cold compresses on my entire face and left arm. Then every 10 minutes they'd come in and dribble cold water over it. The pain level was at it's height, so they started an IV for fluids, and started giving me morphine. They ended up, I think, giving me 17 mgs before I started to stabilize.

When the Dr came in, he explained the severity of the situation and said that while my pain is enormous, and it looks bad, it is not as severe as it could have been.

They applied this silver sulfadiazine cream and non-adhesive dressings to the affected areas - my 10 year old said I looked like the Mummy - gave me an ample supply of the same and how/when to use it.

They then contacted my family physician, whom I have to go in and see this morning.

Oh yeah - and I can't forget the Percocet. Thank God for percocet! But I started feeling alot better last night. The pain really subsided. I have alot of blisters on my arm, ears, and neck though. And my face is pretty raw red.

The worse part was getting up this morning and having to remove the dressings and then shave off what was left of my beard. Fortunately, that region didn't get it as bad as from my nose up. I didn't have to worry about my eye lashes and eye brows. It reminded me of that Seinfeld episode where Uncle Leo lost his and Elaine drew them back on.

But I've always had a beard, so it came as quite a surprise to my kids this morning. My 10 yr old said "Wow Dad, you look strange".

I said "Take a good look son. It's the face of stupidity, and you better hope it's not genetic."

But the Doc said it may look bad, but I'll be back to normal in about 2 weeks.

And then my wife, after realizing I am going to be OK, injects "Maybe you should have set yourself on fire years ago then." ;)

RFS62
10-09-2006, 07:04 AM
Holy crap, GAC!!!!!!

I know it's awful and you're in a lot of pain and discomfort, but you're lucky it wasn't much worse.

Think the moles might have booby trapped the lawnmower?

RedFanAlways1966
10-09-2006, 08:24 AM
GAC... holy. I am glad that you will be okay. I have always said that there is nothing more painful than a burn and I am sure you can testify to that. You and your "household fires"... you gotta stop this!


I said "Take a good look son. It's the face of stupidity, and you better hope it's not genetic."

LMAO. Humor is always the best medicine. Funny! :)

Good thing this happened in the offseason! Take care of yourself.

max venable
10-09-2006, 08:49 AM
GAC...you gonna post a pic or your "new look?" :evil:

Seriously...I'm glad you're okay.

BuckWoody
10-09-2006, 08:57 AM
Day-um! :eek:

I'm glad that everything will end up being OK. A great sense of humor is an indispensable thing to have...good to see you have that going for you still. Take care and stay away from power tools and flammable liquids! ;)

Johnny Footstool
10-09-2006, 09:25 AM
I'm glad you're okay. You easily could have been blinded or worse. Someone was looking out for you -- your guardian angel must be working overtime.

Ltlabner
10-09-2006, 09:27 AM
Man...sorry to hear about this. Hope you recover quickly.

BTW, would you be mad if I sat a few seats away from you if we go to GABP together next year?

GAC
10-09-2006, 09:55 AM
I'm glad you're okay. You easily could have been blinded or worse. Someone was looking out for you -- your guardian angel must be working overtime.

Oh yeah. If I had been bent down closer over the carb, who knows what would have happened. I might have lost more then my eyebrows. ;)

I'm still looking back on it today and trying figure out what caused it to flame up? It had to be a spark from somewhere IMO- but where?

GAC
10-09-2006, 09:56 AM
GAC...you gonna post a pic or your "new look?" :evil:

Seriously...I'm glad you're okay.

I had my daughter take a couple pics of me, but they'll never see the light of day on here.

I sent them to rfs. So you'll have to take his word if he offers it - I look bad. It would make most Post Office pics of the Most Wanted look like models. :lol:

GAC
10-09-2006, 10:01 AM
Getting burned on Sunday doesn't make falling out of the tree on Saturday look so bad.

Samuel was sitting in a lawn chair taking a break and watching when I fell out of the tree.

His exact words were... "Wow Dad! That was awesome! I wish I had the camera!" :lol:

Johnny Footstool
10-09-2006, 10:02 AM
GAC, you've convinced me to stick to my own philosophy of fixing things -- pay someone else to do it.

Chip R
10-09-2006, 10:49 AM
Note to self: Do not buy any Hondas GAC has helped build. ;)
Glad you're OK. Remember, fire, bad.

flyer85
10-09-2006, 10:56 AM
"well if they don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy"

Try duct tape next time or bigger explosives.

Get well soon.

Coffeybro
10-09-2006, 11:06 AM
So Gac, everyone knows your a Reds fan but did you have to try and get a face to match the team.:D All kidding aside I'm glad your ok.

KittyDuran
10-09-2006, 11:16 AM
Whew! Glad you're OK, GAC. I did change the caption under my avatar...http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/devil10.gif;)

pedro
10-09-2006, 11:38 AM
wow gac. glad your ok and hope you're not in too much pain. that's scary.

Handofdeath
10-09-2006, 12:20 PM
You're very lucky you just get to use the burn cream. When I was a year old I was walking around our house and put my hand on one of those bathroom stoves that was actually lit at the time. My dad had to peel my hand (literally) off the stove. Anyway because the burns were so bad they had to do what's called debriding. Basically scrubbing away dead skin cells. My mother had to sit on me so they could do it. I'm glad to hear you're okay. Consider yourself very blessed.

GAC
10-09-2006, 12:25 PM
GAC, you've convinced me to stick to my own philosophy of fixing things -- pay someone else to do it.

If I think it's gonna be a job that I can't do, then I'll hire someone too Johnny. But tinkering around with a push lawnmower, when there isn't much to them to begin with, and which I have done for many years - it didn't seem right taking it to someone.

And anymore, it's hard to find people that do "handyman" jobs. They don't exist anymore.

Maybe because they are dying off from accidents? :lol:

I've got some big beautiful maple trees on my property (average height= 30 ft), but since that huge ice storm last winter, and the fact that no one was tending the yard while we were living elsewhere and rebuilding, they really needed trimming bad. I also had alot of dead branches.

It would have cost me around $1500 to have a tree service come in and do the job. And I couldn't really afford it.

I was at Lowes about 2 weeks ago and saw a Remington electric trimmer (saw w/ a telescopic pole) for $100. It reaches 15 ft. So I bought one, and for the last two weekends have been hitting it trimming the trees. And it's definitely hard work, which I am not afraid of. I finished up the last tree this weekend.

I have 3 huge piles in the far corner of my lot.

I was gonna burn them; but I think I'll pay to have somene haul them away. :evil:

GAC
10-09-2006, 12:28 PM
wow gac. glad your ok and hope you're not in too much pain. that's scary.

http://www.percocetaddiction.com/img/percocet3.bmp

registerthis
10-09-2006, 03:11 PM
Holey moley, that's crazy. Glad you're OK buddy, but my goodness...I don't think I've ever heard of such a thing. And I used to fiddle around with my father's mower all the time. I got it to spit out some nice blue smoke every once in awhile when I put too much oil in, but that's about it. Never got close to blowing the mower up (which, believe me, my friends and I would have tried had we thought it to be possible.)

Anyhow, glad you're OK, if short a layer of skin. It could have been worse--you could have had to finish mowing the lawn after that!

KronoRed
10-09-2006, 03:11 PM
Glad yer ok GAC :)


Maybe that electric mower I complain about so much is not so bad ;)

letsgojunior
10-09-2006, 04:09 PM
Really glad you're okay GAC!

SunDeck
10-09-2006, 05:29 PM
Maybe we need to start a life insurance fund for GAC.
Quickly.

Sorry to hear about your pain, brother- that has to be miserable.
Best wishes.

Spring~Fields
10-09-2006, 07:46 PM
Ouch plus GAC :eek: Been on fire myself and know it hurts alot more than your thoughts here are expressing. You were very fortunate if one can use that expression in such a case. Are your lungs alright?

Now you're sure that this isn't the result of some subconscious effect because of the Reds and Browns multi-year drought? while the fact remains that the moles are undefeated :devil: in your yard? Fess up, you were trying to smoke them out weren't you!

traderumor
10-09-2006, 08:04 PM
Glad to hear you escaped what sounds like could have been much worse. So, how did your son escape harm?

Yachtzee
10-09-2006, 09:03 PM
I'm glad your injuries weren't more serious. Get well.

I must say though, you and fire...I have this image of you looking like Tom from Tom & Jerry were Tom starts smoking the cigar and it blows up in his face.

GAC
10-10-2006, 05:27 AM
Ouch plus GAC :eek: Been on fire myself and know it hurts alot more than your thoughts here are expressing. You were very fortunate if one can use that expression in such a case. Are your lungs alright?

Yes. Fortunately, the force of the explosion threw me back quick enough before I could breath any of it in. :lol:


Now you're sure that this isn't the result of some subconscious effect because of the Reds and Browns multi-year drought? while the fact remains that the moles are undefeated :devil: in your yard? Fess up, you were trying to smoke them out weren't you!

I am not ruling out that this was a set-up job by the moles for all the relatives of theirs I've taken out. I was actually up around 4 AM the other morning, sitting on my back porch, and I could hear some sort of screaming and yelling coming from the woods behind my house? Mole terrorist training camp?




I'm feeeling much better today. I went to the Drs yesterday - they changed the dressings and very pretty nurses coddled me while they pulled off a layer of dead skin and asked me if it hurt?.... I said yes, but keep it up!

It seems I'll be off work for 2 weeks (maybe 3), depending on the healing process.

So I came up with a David Letterman's Top Ten List as to why GAC set himself on fire....

10. It's the only way I can get pretty woman (nurses) to pay attention to me.

9. I can't afford Botox injections.

8. I ignored the warning label that said equiment was safe to operate unless you initials are G.A.C.

7. It was the only way I could stay home and watch the MLB post-season.

6. Auditioning for the role of the Human Torch in the FF sequel.

5. The only way I could insure I had the "Stop, Drop, and Roll" routine down correctly

4. I read that it was the only sure-fire method for removing unsightly ear and nose hairs.

3. It always looked funny whenever it happened to Daffy Duck.

2. I have always idolized Richard Pryor.

and the #1 reason (drum roll... and in my Pee Wee Herman voice)...

"I MEANT TO DO THAT!"

OldRightHander
10-10-2006, 06:27 AM
Well, I'm glad you're ok, but I'm also glad you can look at it with a bit of humor.

GAC
10-10-2006, 06:57 AM
Well, I'm glad you're ok, but I'm also glad you can look at it with a bit of humor.

yeah, I'll be OK. I also realize that if conditions were different, then it could have been alot worse. My wife, when it comes to any type of trial, is on the exact opposite of the spectrum from me. She always looks or sees the bad, or "what could have happened", and it causes her to worry too death. She sometimes gives me a hard time because I refuse to worry - at least not to the extent she does.

It's not that I'm someone special, or any different from anyone else. And yes, we've been through alot this year with the house fire, my oldest boy's surgery (second phase is next week), and now this.

But worrying/fretting over a situation accomplishes nothing IMHO. And I do believe that God will (and has) utilized life's trials to teach and refine us in facing life's difficulties.

TeamCasey
10-10-2006, 07:19 AM
Jesus, GAC! Thank goodness you didn't damage your eyes.

What are we going to do with you?

GAC
10-10-2006, 07:42 AM
Jesus, GAC! Thank goodness you didn't damage your eyes.

What are we going to do with you?

Take out life isurance on me? ;)

SunDeck
10-10-2006, 10:19 AM
I'm glad your injuries weren't more serious. Get well.

I must say though, you and fire...I have this image of you looking like Tom from Tom & Jerry were Tom starts smoking the cigar and it blows up in his face.
Or Daffy Duck- beak on sideways.

traderumor
10-10-2006, 12:04 PM
Or Daffy Duck- beak on sideways.:laugh: I was thinking Wile E. Coyote when reading the account.

flyer85
10-10-2006, 12:06 PM
:laugh: I was thinking Wile E. Coyote when reading the account.Was it an ACME lawn mower that caused the problem?

registerthis
10-10-2006, 12:12 PM
Was it an ACME lawn mower that caused the problem?

I don't know, but the ACME anvil always seemed to be a thorn in Wily's side.

TeamMorris
10-10-2006, 12:46 PM
Good God GAC!!! Leave things alone;)!!!

Really glad you are Ok! Send me pictures;)!

wolfboy
10-10-2006, 01:05 PM
Wow GAC. I'm glad to hear that you are okay. No more fixing things for you! I'm with you on the percocet. I had my appendix removed early yesterday. The local anasthetic on my incision wore off today, and percocet is the only thing tapering the pain. They initially had me on morphine as well. I did not care for that stuff at all. It took care of the pain, but hit me way too hard. Again....be careful GAC. You are very lucky that this wasn't worse.

GAC
10-10-2006, 01:41 PM
Wow GAC. I'm glad to hear that you are okay. No more fixing things for you! I'm with you on the percocet. I had my appendix removed early yesterday. The local anasthetic on my incision wore off today, and percocet is the only thing tapering the pain. They initially had me on morphine as well. I did not care for that stuff at all. It took care of the pain, but hit me way too hard. Again....be careful GAC. You are very lucky that this wasn't worse.

I hope you're feeling beter wolfboy. You're in my prayers.

wolfboy
10-10-2006, 01:44 PM
I hope you're feeling beter wolfboy. You're in my prayers.

Thanks GAC. I'll be praying for a speedy recovery for you as well.

TeamBoone
10-10-2006, 01:48 PM
GAC, I swear... your deeds never cease to amaze me. I don't know how you've survived as long as you have (she says as she shakes her head).

Seriously, thank the Lord!

registerthis
10-10-2006, 02:55 PM
Caught a bit of a show last night abotu a guy who has been struck by lightning three times.

So I guess it could be worse.

GAC
10-12-2006, 06:04 AM
Caught a bit of a show last night abotu a guy who has been struck by lightning three times.

So I guess it could be worse.

T-t-t-th-hats w-w-h-a-at y-y-y-o-o-o-u-u Th-th-th-think!

http://cache.boston.com/bonzai-fba/Original_Photo/2005/08/23/1124825557_8326.jpg

GAC
10-12-2006, 06:40 AM
I've made it to age 50 folks, so it's not all bad. :lol:

I look at it as a percentage thing.

I've done thousands of handyman and odd job in the last 35 years. So when you do alot, and in that timespan you have, lets say, 10 accidents (some serious - as was this one), it does make one appear to be accident prone or susceptible to injury.

It's like playing the odds, and sooner or later, you're gonna get bit due to the enormous amount of times you're involved in the activity over the years.

And in all these years I've had cuts, bruises, and various other minor injuries along the way. Nothing really this serious though. From working on cars, yard equipment, and various odd jobs around the home. Plus, I've also ran all types and makes of machinery in the manufacturing industry for almost 30 years, and without incident (knock on wood).

And in addition.... (and this'll scare the hell out of some of you) back in the 70's I worked on the torpedo and nuc guidance systems on SSBNs.

And I can proudly say that not one time did any accidentally go off. :lol:

Some would say "it only takes once", and that is true; but is that anyway to live our lives? I'd have to say that a small percentage of those accidents were from me being in a hurray and doing something stupid.

And if it is something stupid, then that is what wives are for - to remind you.

But then again.... it's the wives who talk us into, and send us out to do those various jobs.

Let that sink in real good men the next time she asks you to trim the bushes or clean out the gutters..... and offers to steady the ladder or run the extension cord! ;)

But we all have accidents. And I bet that if we sat down and tried to trace our steps that lead to it, we'd find that in a majority of the cases it would point to something behavioral on our part or something we could have (or should have) done differently if we could go back.

I was talking to my one brother the other day about this situation, and he believes it had something to do with the electric start switch on the lawmower and the fact that it had been sitting idle in storage since the summer of '05.

Even though I took all the other precautions prior to working on the mower, I didn't consider that something internally may have went wrong over that period of time. And something had to cause a spark for the gas to ignite.

My next push mower will be the old type with the pull string. ;)

Meanwhile.... I am healing up OK. its just gonna be about a 3 week process according to the Dr.

And I'm enjoying the MLB post-season.

It's gonna be kinda funny though next week when I take my son in for his surgery. They are probably gonna ask "Who are we operating on?" :lol:

Ltlabner
10-12-2006, 06:50 AM
And in addition.... (and this'll scare the hell out of some of you) back in the 70's I worked on the torpedo and nuc guidance systems on SSBNs.

And I can proudly say that not one time did any accidentally go off.

That we know of.......... ;)

Glad to hear you are on the path to recovery buddy.

Spring~Fields
10-12-2006, 10:44 AM
And if it is something stupid, then that is what wives are for - to remind you.

But then again.... it's the wives who talk us into, and send us out to do those various jobs.



:confused: Isn't it the wives that get the stocks, bonds, real estate and life insurance proceeds? Wasn't it Eve that talked Adam into? Sounds like a hereditary plot to me.
Maybe it wasn't the moles after all :evil:

GAC
10-12-2006, 12:17 PM
All I know is that over the last few mornings, while I'm sitting drinking my morning cup of coffee, my wife walks by, takes a look at my face, smiles, and shakes her head!

So maybe I'm not the only one who can't do anything right? Thank God! :lol: