PDA

View Full Version : The "GAC awards"



Ltlabner
01-05-2007, 11:59 AM
Whilest making a sandwich for lunch just moments ago I nearly sliced the end of my finger off. What a mess. From hence forth self inflicted wounds shal be called "pulling a GAC" in honor of our great friend from the north who occasionally causes himself harm.

Any intresting self inflicted injury stories to share with the group?

My neatest one was when I was messing around with a power sprayer and gave myself about a 3 inch scar down the length of my wrist/hand because I zapped myself with the high pressure stream. I was supposed to be cleaning a driveway, but instead was writing my name in the multch when said injury occured.

pedro
01-05-2007, 12:04 PM
I sliced my pinky open on a broken piece of porcelain earlier this week. I bled like a stuck pig.

KronoRed
01-05-2007, 12:08 PM
I cut my ring finger badly taking down the Christmas tree :D

dabvu2498
01-05-2007, 12:18 PM
I was cutting up some cardboard boxes several years ago and slit my wrist wide open. I was home alone so I had to call the life squad. After the ER doctor bandaged me up, they made sit with a shrink for a half hour before they'd let me go.

RANDY IN INDY
01-05-2007, 12:32 PM
Putting a sharpened lawn mower blade back on the mower and nearly cutting my thumb off. (He hears from the past........................"Gloves, son. You always use gloves." Thanks Dad. I've remembered ever since.)

RANDY IN INDY
01-05-2007, 12:37 PM
That doesn't excuse my dad from turning the riding lawn mower over on a steep bank while he was trying to balance up on the high end of the seat. Nearly cut his rear end off.

Took him to the doctor to get sewn up and I'll never forget what the Doctor told him. He said, "Dale, I've seen people cut off their fingers, their toes, their feet and hands but you're the first fellow that I've ever seen that cut his...................off. Well, you know, that other word for a donkey.

We couldn't help but laugh. I miss my dad.

flyer85
01-05-2007, 12:52 PM
I was on a first name basis with the ER docs when I was growing up.

Lets see
- cut open head by falling into corner of TV, getting hit with a golf club, slipping in the tub, hitting the dishwasher
- cut open hand by going through glass window, opening a Pringles can
- cut arm by bouncing off a telephone while scaling a fence
- knocked out a front tooth by falling with harmonica in my mouth
- fractured skull and eye swollen shut by getting hit with a rock
- broken thumb playing ball
- numerous sprained ankles

I'm sure Ive missed a few. Other than the rock and golf club they were self inflicted.

I've slowed down in my old age.

RANDY IN INDY
01-05-2007, 01:22 PM
Kids used to throw rocks more than they do today. I was always getting hit with rocks, not to mention hitting a few people with them.

Razor Shines
01-05-2007, 01:22 PM
My worst injury was during high school. I tore my ACL during basketball season my senior year, and the doctor wanted me to have surgery right away, well nothing doin' I wasn't going to miss baseball season. He finally gave and said if I just had arthroscopic surgery to clean it up, rehabbed hard and wore a brace I might be able to play baseball. So I did and made it through almost the whole season, then one game I was pitching and there was a ground ball back toward the middle so I turned to back hand it and as I planted my left leg (bad knee) it completely gave out and bent in a way previously I had not thought possible, it was the worst pain in my life. So I gave in and went ahead and had the reconstructive surgery. It was a big mistake to wait because I missed out on basketball scholarships, but things turned out ok.

registerthis
01-05-2007, 01:26 PM
I slammed my thumb in a copier drawer yesterday, took about 5 minutes to regain feeling, and much longer to stop the blood loss.

I guess I GACed myself up pretty good.

Roy Tucker
01-05-2007, 02:20 PM
I was pruning various trees, bushes, etc at the Tucker estate last summer.

Decided to prune one last limb, grabbed the branch, reached up with my razor-sharp Felco pruners, had a brain cramp, and about cut the tip of my finger off. Blood all over creation.

The worst part was that it was 6 PM on Sunday, all the urgent care centers were closed, I was going to have to go to the regular ER, and worst of all, I wasn't going to get that beer that I was *really* looking forward to.

Got to the ER where they appeared to be mobilizing for WWIII or something. I asked the nurse and they said they had 25 inbound units from a roller coaster accident at Kings Island (the Son of Beast thing from last summer). I think they set a record for getting me stitched up. While waiting to check out, I held icebags on people's necks.

It was a GAC day.

SunDeck
01-05-2007, 06:14 PM
I was cutting oak strips on my dad's table saw. Of course, he'd removed the kick guard and one strip bound and shot back into my chest. It knocked me back about five feet into his basement wall and I'm pretty it sure broke a rib. Never knew for sure- I was too embarrassed to get it checked.

A couple of years ago, I was putting a new circuit for a workshop in our garage. My wife came out and asked me something and I forgot that the circuit I was working on was live. When I cut the romex, sparks shot all over me and burned two 12 gauge sized holes right through my wire cutters. That's about the closest I've come to buying the farm- if I hadn't been on a fiberglass ladder, my socks would have been fried.
I keep those cutters in my tool box to remind me to check the power before cutting into wires.

vaticanplum
01-05-2007, 06:19 PM
Decided to prune one last limb, grabbed the branch, reached up with my razor-sharp Felco pruners, had a brain cramp, and about cut the tip of my finger off. Blood all over creation.

:runaway:

vaticanplum
01-05-2007, 06:31 PM
I went through a pretty good stretch over my birthday in 2001. My boyfriend badly broke his wrist, and the next day when he was talking about physical therapy I passed out (I'm quite prone to passing out when it comes to medical stuff). Problem was that I was on the other side of the couch and he couldn't stop me from falling with his one good hand, so I hit my head on the coffee table when I fell and started bleeding. He drove me to the hospital, one-handed, where they deemed me ok and bandaged my head. I drove home, and it was a very hot day, and on the way home the car overheated. We got out to look at it, and he touched the (engine? something) with his one good hand and burned the crap out of it. We had to turn around and go back to the hospital, only we couldn't drive the car so we had to call an ambulance. We were in the ER three times, and the auto body shop once, in under 24 hours.

My best injury story isn't mine, though. It's not a real GAC story because it's not an accident-prone thing, but it's too good not to tell. When a friend of mine was 10 years old, her older brother got a Jeep (a real one, with a bar for four-wheeling) for his birthday. They lived in Asheville, North Carolina, by a big lake, and he asked if he could take her for a spin, and his parents said sure, but be careful because it only has lap belts right now and we need to get that fixed. They approached a one-lane bridge, and the last thing my friend remembers is a car coming straight at them.

When they got to the hospital, the doctors were totally confounded by my friend. Her face was dripping blood everywhere, she was clearly bleeding from somewhere above her shoulders, but her face didn't have a scratch or a bruise on it. Then they looked in her mouth. And saw her eye sockets. What had happened was that when the cars it, she pitched forward and her upper lip caught on the handlebar while she kept moving forward, so she essentially got her face ripped off. She was actually very lucky -- an inch shorter or taller and she could have shattered her jaw or suffered serious brain damage. As it was she required surgery but was fine, and had no visible effects at all -- she's a beautiful girl.

Rojo
01-05-2007, 08:17 PM
Riding a bike down a hill, drunk on Dr. Pepper and 151. My foot gets caught in the spokes. When the foot meets the fork, that wheel stops. The bike then catapualts me about 25 feet right on my elbow. I still have pins in it.

George Foster
01-05-2007, 10:36 PM
Last month, after I "numbed up" a 7 year old, I was putting the needle back in the sleeve, but I missed and put it about 5 mm into my thumb. Thank God it was a 7 year old and not a single middle aged man wearing leather, named Mango:eek: :D

GAC
01-06-2007, 03:49 AM
Riding a bike down a hill, drunk on Dr. Pepper and 151. My foot gets caught in the spokes. When the foot meets the fork, that wheel stops. The bike then catapualts me about 25 feet right on my elbow. I still have pins in it.

AND WE HAVE A WINNER! :mooner:

I'm flattered (I think) that you would name such a prestigious award after me. And those are some good stories. It seems some of you should be doing anything that involves cutting/sharp instruments.

But you guys have a long ways to go to catch up to "The Master".

I told my wife the other day that we needed to do something to put the spark back in our marriage and she went around and took every incendiary device out of the house. :evil:

Heath
01-06-2007, 08:54 AM
AND WE HAVE A WINNER! :mooner:

I'm flattered (I think) that you would name such a prestigious award after me. And those are some good stories. It seems some of you should be doing anything that involves cutting/sharp instruments.

But you guys have a long ways to go to catch up to "The Master".

I told my wife the other day that we needed to do something to put the spark back in our marriage and she went around and took every incendiary device out of the house. :evil:

Thank goodness your last name isn't Darwin........


:D

Caseyfan21
01-06-2007, 09:16 AM
This one isn't me, but I was witness. Earlier this year my roommate was trying to open a can of chili for dinner. He used a can opener but our can opener isn't the best so he pulled out a butter knife and began hacking away (you can easily see where this is going). I was watching thinking in the back of my head this probably wasn't a good idea but I didn't say anything. He proceeded to slice open his pinkie on the can and we had to take him to the ER for stitches. Now that in itself isn't a big deal but he's a trumpet playing member of the OSU marching band, the said injury occurred on a Friday night (night before gameday), and the injury was on his playing hand. Luckily he doesn't have to use that finger much in his playing so he was still able to play. There was a time of us trying to calm him down, not because he was worried about the blood but because he was worried he wouldn't be able to play the next day.

creek14
01-06-2007, 10:01 AM
I once caught the clutch pedal of our riding mower on a power pole guidewire and flipped the mower on top of me.

I fell off the top of a ladder while painting my basketball backboard.

I was hit by a car while riding my bike.

I was hit by a car while walking in the crosswalk at Meijer.

Then there was the *Big Fall of 2001* when I broke my leg and ankle in a total of 8 places.

Heath
01-06-2007, 10:04 AM
Then there was the *Big Fall of 2001* when I broke my leg and ankle in a total of 8 places.

What creek forgets to tell you is that she did that trying to chase Adam Dunn in the players parking lot at the old Cinergy Field. Adam graciously carried her directly to Christ Hospital. :D

creek14
01-06-2007, 10:08 AM
What creek forgets to tell you is that she did that trying to chase Adam Dunn in the players parking lot at the old Cinergy Field. Adam graciously carried her directly to Christ Hospital. :D
Gesh Heath, don't give away all my secrets! :mooner: ;)

HumnHilghtFreel
01-06-2007, 11:35 AM
Last year I went to plug something into the wall outlet and the very tip of my finger was still on one of the prongs, and I immediately started shaking. My mom was in the room and said something to the likes of "ha ha, very funny." I couldn't feel my arm for a solid 10-15 minutes.

Spring~Fields
01-06-2007, 12:17 PM
You guys are too risk adverse to be a GAC nominee.

Try these out as a kid:

Fall out of a hay mow on the farm landing on my head (at least I have an excuse :( )

Use to love to climb trees as high as I could, I made a discovery, that I was afraid of heights, after I got up as high as I could go, I would freeze with fear after looking down and could not get back down. :help: (duh, never was labeled very bright :confused: )

Stuck my right foot under a power mower in GACís old neighborhood (something in the water ?? :all_cohol)

Lit my hand on fire creating a torch while tossing gas on a wood pile (very therapeutic,
I got over fire fascination)

Frustrated, locked the car door slamming it shut on my thumb, unable to get it out. (that scream you heard was me!!, now I use more self control, I move my thumb first.)

As a much wiser adult:

Fell off a ladder while painting a sign for an employer, breaking one wrist and severely spraining the other. (try relieving yourself with no hands. :yikes: )

1975 brand new firebird, parked it on the hill out front during freezing rain and got out. Should have seen me chasing it as it became self propelled, like a sled, at the same time trying to keep my name out of the paper for being the first man ever to be ran over by a parked car. (it missed me)

My best work was putting brakes on a 77 Grand Prix, as it set on an incline, we call it a small hill, I skipped the part about bleeding the brakes. (males don't need to read the instructions first, it will be ok) The neighbor lady was really upset and at the same time amazed at how stupid one could be when the car rolled into the side of her garage knocking a portion of it off the foundation.

You guys are giving me PTSD. :laugh:

*Disclaimer - all other events that transpired have been omitted for fear that you guys will have me probated, certified and committed, especially post college.

Chip R
01-06-2007, 03:46 PM
When I was in college I had this old car. The lock on the trunk had been broken for a few years. We lived on a gravel road and the trunk hadn't been opened in years. I got a locksmith to just take the lock out so I could just open it with a blade screwdriver. I went up to summer school that year and I had to be back that Friday because my sister was getting married and I was an usher. So I went to the car wash on Monday and decided to clean out the trunk since it was really dirty. Not only was there dirt in there but there was a collection of tire irons, lug wrenches, jacks and a regular sized tire. I wanted to take everything out of there and thought the smart thing to do was to put all the stuff on the tire instead of taking everything out seperatly. So I got everything on the tire, picked the tire up and dropped it on the pavement. The jack bounces up and smacks me right on the chin and opens up a cut. It wasn't a huge gash but I was bleeding pretty good and I needed stitches. I got them out on Thursday before I left for home and the wedding was the next day. It didn't look too bad. A little pink but it didn't show up in the photos. Pretty dumb maneuver, though.

vaticanplum
01-06-2007, 06:11 PM
Use to love to climb trees as high as I could, I made a discovery, that I was afraid of heights, after I got up as high as I could go, I would freeze with fear after looking down and could not get back down. :help: (duh, never was labeled very bright :confused: )

I had that problem at first; I did get over it eventually. I was quite a tree climber as a kid and fell out a few times, never hurt myself badly though.

This is a pretty freak accident: in the woods near my cousins' house, there used to be a kind of old fort/treehouse pretty high up in a tree, and a really springy tree next to it. That springy tree was old and responsive enough to our body weight that we could hop onto it from the fort and it would bend over close enough to the ground so that we could jump off, then it would spring back up for the next kid. It was fun.

Well, one time a kid hopped down and the tree sprung back up for one of my cousins, who was nine years old at the time. But he was standing too close to the edge and the tree hit him in the head. He started bleeding everywhere, but managed to WALK HOME. His head was completely cracked open. He went through surgery and stayed in the hospital for several weeks. It was quite a serious accident; it could have been fatal or caused him severe brain damage. As it is he's fine, apart from occasionally picking up radio stations from all the metal in his head and being a Republican.

Spring~Fields
01-07-2007, 01:04 AM
But he was standing too close to the edge and the tree hit him in the head. He started bleeding everywhere, but managed to WALK HOME. His head was completely cracked open. He went through surgery and stayed in the hospital for several weeks. It was quite a serious accident; it could have been fatal or caused him severe brain damage.

Oh my god, that sounds like a nasty accident.

GAC
01-07-2007, 04:29 AM
My daughter, for whatever reason, lost a few of the drivers in her computer yesterday. I had it up and running in about 15 minutes.

But when it came time to help out the wife and vacuum the living room with the Hoover Wind Tunnel (self propelled), I tried to sweep around my son's book bag lying next to the couch and sucked the book bag strap right up into the rollers and snapped the belt!

My wife shakes her head alot in this house. :lol:

I also successfully changed two light bulbs too. Baby steps.

GAC
01-07-2007, 04:32 AM
When I was in college I had this old car. The lock on the trunk had been broken for a few years. We lived on a gravel road and the trunk hadn't been opened in years.

I had a Ford Grand Torino with the same trunk problem. These work wonders. :lol:

http://thmb.inkfrog.com/thumbn/fladeals/bungee.jpg=600

GAC
01-07-2007, 04:37 AM
I was pruning various trees, bushes, etc at the Tucker estate last summer.

Decided to prune one last limb, grabbed the branch, reached up with my razor-sharp Felco pruners, had a brain cramp, and about cut the tip of my finger off. Blood all over creation.

I bought one of these this past fall to trim the dead branches on our humongous maple trees around the property. The trees got nailed really bad a couple winters back with that ice storm that hit central Ohio.

My wife refused to look outdoors while I was working. ;)

http://www.northerntool.com/images/product/images/1502391_lg.jpg

RANDY IN INDY
01-07-2007, 08:56 AM
Now that's some saw!

RANDY IN INDY
01-07-2007, 08:58 AM
Bet you were wearing the goggles and hardhat, just like the guy in the picture, huh GAC?;)

RFS62
01-07-2007, 10:06 AM
I bought one of these this past fall to trim the dead branches on our humongous maple trees around the property. The trees got nailed really bad a couple winters back with that ice storm that hit central Ohio.

My wife refused to look outdoors while I was working. ;)

http://www.northerntool.com/images/product/images/1502391_lg.jpg



Oh dear Lord...

GAC with a weapon like that?

I'd sooner give a loaded machine gun to a monkey in the middle of a crowded mall.

TeamCasey
01-07-2007, 11:36 AM
That saw is just SO wrong. I have one like it with just a blade. It's come apart at the telescoping area many times while I was sawing.

This Christmas, I was lighting candles all around the living room. TB is nagging me to use the trigger lighter thingie, but I ignored her and just used my bic. All of a sudden, was thumb got the worst of a flame and in a reaction, I pulled my hand back and branded my lip with the metal part of the lighter. Hmmmmmm ..... she got the last laugh, and I went back to work swearing that I didn't have Herpes.

TeamMorris
01-07-2007, 05:51 PM
It really was funny!! Stupid but funny;)

Spring~Fields
01-07-2007, 06:27 PM
Oh dear Lord...

GAC with a weapon like that?

I'd sooner give a loaded machine gun to a monkey in the middle of a crowded mall.

:lol: :lol:
:evil:

vaticanplum
01-07-2007, 06:31 PM
Oh my god, that sounds like a nasty accident.

Yeah, definitely. My family has terrible luck with accidents...we joke a lot on this board about this where GAC is concerned (and it is hysterically funny), but GAC is very lucky and I know he knows that. He has the lives of a cat at least. Buying a machine like that chainsaw on a stick thing is definitely tempting fate, though ;)

KittyDuran
01-07-2007, 08:45 PM
IIRC I think I've mentioned the mishaps of my little sister:

1) as a toddler - she chased our puppy and would pull it's tail - she cornered it under a coffee table and it reared around and bit her around her eye. She still carries the scar tho' it's travelled up her face.
2) Also as a toddler - got into the garage and drank turpentine and had to have her stomach pumped.
3) My mom was downstairs ironng and talking with a neighbor, and she wasn't paying attention to my sister - who put the hook end of a coat hanger thro the bottom of her mouth.
4) Playing on the swingset down at a community park - we would try to push the swing as hard as we could (w/o a person in it) to see if we could push it over the top. My sister did and was distracted and the swing hit her in the forehead.
5) Tripped and fell on a sewer gate, hitting her forehead.
6) Playing "dodge" with our bikes - she crashes into steel garbage cans, flips over the bars of the bike and lands spread eagle on a rim - cutting her down in the nether region.
7) Scraps her shin almost down to the bone by trying to go through the rungs of pool ladder.

Spring~Fields
01-07-2007, 11:24 PM
He has the lives of a cat at least. Buying a machine like that chainsaw on a stick thing is definitely tempting fate, though ;)

Could you just imagine the insurance rates in his neighborhood :eek: ? Suppose they have bunkers or protective barriers?

BoydsOfSummer
01-08-2007, 12:24 AM
Me and two friends were hanging out one day back in high school. We lived in the country, all about 2 miles apart. Troy had a moped and we didn't. We decided to go to Troy's and play some roundball.

Three guys. One moped. What to do?

Our collective genius came up with this plan: Troy drives the moped, John rides on back, Rik gets pulled behind on John's ten-speed. Problem solved.

One end of rope tied to the back of moped. Check. Other end wrapped around my fist and held tightly. Check. Off we go, wind in our hair, cruising at top speeds nearing 25-30 mph.

Halfway to our destination is a really sharp curve. Normally not much of an obstacle. Troy goes into the curve and backs off the throttle some to get through it. This creates slack in the rope and when they clear the turn I'm just heading into it. Troy comes through the turn and guns it back to full speed. This of course takes up the slack in the rope very fast and jerks my hand with the rope wrapped around it, turning the wheel and dumping me over the handlebars to be dragged for several feet until the rope unwrapped.

It drove one of the gear shifters into my shin pretty deep and I had a serious case of road rash from my fingers to my armpit.

That might have been my last bike ride other than the stationary exercise kind.

RANDY IN INDY
01-08-2007, 08:19 AM
IIRC I think I've mentioned the mishaps of my little sister:

1) as a toddler - she chased our puppy and would pull it's tail - she cornered it under a coffee table and it reared around and bit her around her eye. She still carries the scar tho' it's travelled up her face.
2) Also as a toddler - got into the garage and drank turpentine and had to have her stomach pumped.
3) My mom was downstairs ironng and talking with a neighbor, and she wasn't paying attention to my sister - who put the hook end of a coat hanger thro the bottom of her mouth.
4) Playing on the swingset down at a community park - we would try to push the swing as hard as we could (w/o a person in it) to see if we could push it over the top. My sister did and was distracted and the swing hit her in the forehead.
5) Tripped and fell on a sewer gate, hitting her forehead.
6) Playing "dodge" with our bikes - she crashes into steel garbage cans, flips over the bars of the bike and lands spread eagle on a rim - cutting her down in the nether region.
7) Scraps her shin almost down to the bone by trying to go through the rungs of pool ladder.

That's some list, Kitty. Is she still accident prone?

KittyDuran
01-08-2007, 08:22 AM
That's some list, Kitty. Is she still accident prone?If she is, she probably doesn't tell us...;)

GAC
01-08-2007, 08:23 AM
I'll have you all know that I used that saw for 3 days straight without incident. They work great as a matter of fact.

It was on the fourth day that I fell out of the tree while using a hand saw. That was when my 10 yr old, who was watching me, yelled "Wow Dad! That was awesome. I wish I had a camera!"

And on the fifth day I set myself on fire working on the lawn mower.

On the sixth day I rested. And the seventh, and the eighth, and the ninth..... :lol:

Roy Tucker
01-08-2007, 09:59 AM
I bought one of these this past fall to trim the dead branches on our humongous maple trees around the property. The trees got nailed really bad a couple winters back with that ice storm that hit central Ohio.

My wife refused to look outdoors while I was working. ;)

http://www.northerntool.com/images/product/images/1502391_lg.jpg

Ooooo, I got to get me one of those.

Back in the day, we were having a party at someone's farm. As usual, massive quantities of alcohol and other substances were consumed. An impromptu volleyball game started. The problem was, there were a lot of tree limbs in the way.

Being the practical guys we are, we soon found a solution. The farm owner had a cherry picker that we could use to trim the limbs. However, the cherry picker didn't have a basket on it. Sane people would have discarded the idea as unworkable.

To the rescue comes the solver of all problems, duct tape! We duct-taped a guy on the end of the cherry picker and armed with a chain saw. Of course, we gave him safety goggles and a heavy jacket to wear. Safety first!

Did I mention we had been drinking? Heavily? Of couse, the cherry picker operator (who assured us he was fine) was massively drunk and repeatedly bashes the duct-taped guy with a running chain saw against the tree branches. When blood began to drip down, we realized maybe it hadn't been such a good idea.

It took us a bit to cut the guy loose from the duct tape since all the blood made everything slippery and he kept passing out. We told the people at the ER that he had been running with scissors. They didn't believe us.

MrCinatit
01-08-2007, 10:51 AM
I've rarely been seriously hurt, because I am a grown up wuss. I run from danger.
Not always successfully, though.
When I was about four, I fell off a picnic table. Apparently, I was pretty banged up by it, though I don't remember it. My parents said that deserved a long trip to the emergency room.
Piqua High School had a softball in the back with a field almost literally made of gravel and sand. One day, I decided it was a good idea to slide into second on a close play while wearing shorts. Little bit o' blood from that one.
Back in the day, if we wanted to make orange juice from concentrate, we had to use a can opener - at the same time, the sides of the can were made of cardboard. Opening one can, the opener slipped, my hand slipped and I sliced my wrist pretty good. Technically, I should have gone to the emergency room for that one, as the cut was rather near the vein. However, I kinda failed to let my parents know about it for a couple of years.
Finally, when I was in early highschool, we had one heck of a snow - snow, then some sleet. it created a spectacular sledding opportunity. A friend of mine used this to our best advantage. We took one of those flat blue really slick sleds (I call them "blue death", and greased up the bottoms). Yeah - it finally dawned on me that it was a bad idea, halfway down the hill as I sped towards a collection of trees in front of our creek. I chose the trees, hitting it butt first at what seemed to me to be about a billion miles per hour. My back has never been the same.
Not to be outdone, my friend decided to give it a shot. He shot for a longer side of the hill - unfortunately, he did not inform me of this plan. Had he, I would have told him about the barbed wire in the middle of the field. I still don't remember what he grabbed onto - pretty sure it was one of my parents' small pines - but he stopped himself just in time.

GAC
01-08-2007, 11:11 AM
Ooooo, I got to get me one of those.

Back in the day, we were having a party at someone's farm. As usual, massive quantities of alcohol and other substances were consumed. An impromptu volleyball game started. The problem was, there were a lot of tree limbs in the way.

Being the practical guys we are, we soon found a solution. The farm owner had a cherry picker that we could use to trim the limbs. However, the cherry picker didn't have a basket on it. Sane people would have discarded the idea as unworkable.

To the rescue comes the solver of all problems, duct tape! We duct-taped a guy on the end of the cherry picker and armed with a chain saw. Of course, we gave him safety goggles and a heavy jacket to wear. Safety first!

Did I mention we had been drinking? Heavily? Of couse, the cherry picker operator (who assured us he was fine) was massively drunk and repeatedly bashes the duct-taped guy with a running chain saw against the tree branches. When blood began to drip down, we realized maybe it hadn't been such a good idea.

It took us a bit to cut the guy loose from the duct tape since all the blood made everything slippery and he kept passing out. We told the people at the ER that he had been running with scissors. They didn't believe us.

Got mine at Lowes for $100. It's electric and works great.

Spring~Fields
01-08-2007, 05:20 PM
I'll have you all know that I used that saw for 3 days straight without incident. They work great as a matter of fact.

It was on the fourth day that I fell out of the tree while using a hand saw. That was when my 10 yr old, who was watching me, yelled "Wow Dad! That was awesome. I wish I had a camera!"

And on the fifth day I set myself on fire working on the lawn mower.

On the sixth day I rested. And the seventh, and the eighth, and the ninth..... :lol:


:clap: :clap: :clap:

i_heart_jason
01-09-2007, 04:15 PM
~ sliced the tip of my thumb off on a meat slicer while working in a deli.
~ sliced my forefinger open with a friend's pocketknife opening a birthday present
~ slipped on the pool ladder thus straddling the edge of the pool
~ did a backflip in a swing and landed flat on my face
~ ended up in the chiropractor's office for 6 weeks due an "incident" at the "girl dr"
~ broken toe accidentally kicking the couch because i was mad at SCRedsFans
~ fallen due to high heel boots too many times to name

Dom Heffner
01-09-2007, 05:13 PM
I could put GAC to shame.

One fine example: We had bought a big block of cheese and I sliced off too big of a piece for a simple grilled cheese sandwich. So I held the cheese in the air with my right hand under it and my left hand held a knife at the top of the slice. You already see what happened, of course, but I honestly didn't see it coming. After 5 shots, tendon surgery, 5 stitches, 4 weeks in a brace, and 4 weeks in phydical therapy I was somewhat new again. It still bothers me and that was 20 years ago.

Funny story from the incident: my physical therapist was explaining to me the importance of wearing my hand brace at all times, 24 hours a day. He couldn't speak English very well - I think he was from India- and he explained to me this way:

"Now listen to me...I am going to tell you to wear this brace at all times to keep your hand still, even when you sleep. I had one patient who told me he did not need to wear it at night because he does not use his hand when he's in bed. I tell him that's what I worried about." He then let out a laugh that was just awesome.

Classic, eh?

Roy Tucker
01-09-2007, 05:19 PM
I was in the shop with my father-in-law and brother-in-law when my b-i-l "degloved" 2 of his fingers in a grinder.

That was quite the sight. Shop accidents are particularly nasty. He hung in there pretty well though. We picked up the pieces, put it all on ice, and took him to the ER.