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View Full Version : Could a morbidly obese goalie shut out an NHL Team?



Unassisted
12-13-2007, 10:11 AM
The Wall Street Journal has an excerpt from Todd Gallagher's new book "Andy Roddick Beat Me With a Frying Pan: Taking the Field with Pro Athletes and Olympians to Answer Sports Fans' Burning Questions."

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB119143109983647814.html


It's not hard to imagine an owner looking for an unfair advantage to "break" the rules of a sport. Baseball owner Bill Veeck famously batted 3'7? Eddie Gaedel at leadoff in a baseball game despite, or more accurately, because of, his diminutive strike zone. Charlie Finley employed Olympic sprinter Herb Washington as a pinch runner for his Oakland A's. Chicago Bulls GM Jerry Krause once shaved a gorilla and put it in a Bill Wennington uniform in order to get more power in the post. For hockey, the question is simple and has been asked thousands of times by hardcore sports fans and casual observers, from sportswriters like ESPN's Bill Simmons (in an article entitled "33 Ways to Make Sports Better") to Rob Lowe's and Bradley Whitford's characters on The West Wing: Why not go out and find the fattest goalie you can to block the net?

The rest of the chapter is at the link (http://online.wsj.com/article/SB119143109983647814.html).

westofyou
12-13-2007, 10:44 AM
Why not go out and find the fattest goalie you can to block the net?

Gump says 'ello

http://www.abdcards.com/photos/hockey-photos/apwrsley.jpg

My bet is a fat goalie is a slow goalie, and a slow goalie gives up space to the shooter whenever he makes his first move.

Boston Red
12-13-2007, 10:46 AM
My bet is a fat goalie is a slow goalie, and a slow goalie gives up space to the shooter whenever he makes his first move.

You really need to read the whole article, because I don't think you get what he means by "fat" from that excerpt. It's a classic.

SunDeck
12-13-2007, 10:54 AM
I don't think even this guy could cover the whole goal.

http://i.cnn.net/cnn/2003/SHOWBIZ/Movies/09/01/film.python.reut/story.creosote.jpg

MrCinatit
12-13-2007, 10:57 AM
I don't think even this guy could cover the whole goal.


Yeah, but no one's going to be willing to go near the goal.
Though I suspect a puck could sneak in if it were wafer thin.

westofyou
12-13-2007, 10:59 AM
You really need to read the whole article, because I don't think you get what he means by "fat" from that excerpt. It's a classic.

Yep it is...


so I decided to continue researching how to ruin pro hockey forever. And no, that doesn't mean seeing if I could get their Versus deal extended.


"You might spear him and see if chocolate came out."

Highlifeman21
12-13-2007, 11:21 AM
I've read that chapter from the book, and they touch largely upon the fact that someone morbidly obese wouldn't pass the NHL required physical, and that if the stars somehow align and said obese person passes the physical, then the next speed bump in the theory is equipment size limitations. The morbidly obese would still have to use "normal" regulation size pads, rather than pads designed to cover their body. So, in that respect, the morbidly obese would be very unprotected, even while wearing the regulation pads. Said unprotection would in turn result in a lot of pain while trying to stop shots. Pain would lead to slower reflexes/reaction, due to the fact the fat goalie knows every shot will hurt.

Bottomline, it was debunked.

Fascinating though. The pictures of the normal guy in the fat suit with the regulation sized pads are worth the price of admission alone.

Unassisted
12-13-2007, 11:55 AM
Fascinating though. The pictures of the normal guy in the fat suit with the regulation sized pads are worth the price of admission alone.

I wish that the WSJ excerpt had included pictures. From the description, it sounded like it was quite a sight.

camisadelgolf
12-16-2007, 04:34 AM
Atom & His Package would be very interested to hear about this.