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jojo
04-16-2008, 01:39 PM
This was emailed to me from a friend who found it on the website for Lance McCallister's local radio show. I've long since quit listening to local sports talk radio because I think it causes brain damage. That said, this was well worth sharing IMHO and seems like it might be applicable to an environment like this one.

http://www.thelotd.com/lance/blog


Out of the woodwork:

Here we come....all of us.....including me. Reds fans dealing with a 6-8 record and a four game losing streak.
Who are we? Well, we have multiple personalities:

*It's over fan: Inists team will never see .500 again...this year, next year, ever!

*It's early fan: Points out there are still 148 games left, the bats will heat up when the weather does, says to look at the back of their baseball card.

*He's terrible fan: Describes slumping player as, "terrible", "horrible" or as "worst player on the planet"....caps it off by insisting he, himself, could do better.

*Big trade fan: Has it all figured out...the Reds need to deal their spare parts and bad contracts, plus draft picks, and some $, in exchange for the best two players on any other team. And then trade one of those players to another team for a player to be named later and the Giants AA CF he read about in Baseball America.

*Told ya fan: Cites his call on Thursday Dec 17th at 3:47 pointing out the fact the Reds need a RH bat.

*Hitting coach fan: Says Dunn needs to move up in the box, and angle his front foot 47-degrees out from where he currently stands....and crouch a little.

*Pitching coach fan: After reviewing his DVR catalog of Todd Coffey's last 10 appearances has spotted a flaw in his deliver and can't believe nobody else has discovered it.

*Position fan: Solves the problems by moving guys like the Skyline scoreboard game. Put Scott Hatteberg at catcher, move Adam Dunn to 1B and give Hopper a shot at 3B.

*Cut and eat fan: Don't worry about how much they make or who replaces them....just cut guys and eat their contracts.

*Should have never fan: All previous moves were bad. Should not have traded Josh Hamilton. Points to Sunday as the reason releasing Phil Dumatrait was a mistake. Wishes for Jorge Cantu and Cody Ross. And thinks Victor Santos had something left.

*Longevity Fan: Starts all calls with "I've been a Reds fan for _____ years.

*Look ahead fan: Already wondering about free class of 2009 and if the Reds can make a run at CC Sabathia.

*Journeyman fan: Insists guys like Tom Shearn deserve more of a shot
*Line-up fan: Believes Reds troubles begin with the batting order and insists moving a guy up or down three spots in batting order will fix the problem. Points to the success of Tony LaRussa and the Cardinals.

*SABR guy: Pulls out a stat category 99.4326 % of fans have never heard of like VORP or MLVr to explain the problem.

*BRM fan: Wonders why these Reds players can't play the game like those Reds players from Big Red Machine.

*Back-up QB fan: Yea, I know, wrong spot....but concept is same....play the guys that are sitting and sit the guys that are playing.

*Louisville shuttle fan: All aboard...next stop Louisville! Take 5 Reds, drop them off, and pick up five new players at AAA. Options? We dont need no stinkin' options.

*Toss a base fan: Angry that Dusty Baker hasn't gotten as mad as he is.

*Fight fan: Wants a bench clearing brawl or hard slide to show this team cares as much as he does.

*Manager fan: Starts his call by pointing out the number of years he has managed a little league team.

*Fire manager fan: Fire Dusty and see if Sparky Andersonwants to come back...if not...hire Billy Bean's AAA manager.

*Fire general manager fan: Wants to get it over with, just hand the job to Walt Jocketty

*Makes too much fan: Compares slumping players salary to their own and offers to do players job for half player's salary.

*Cost too much to go fan: States he'd rather spend his money on minor league baseball than pay to watch the Reds.

*Mike Brown fan: Blames anything and everything on Mike Brown...including the lack of scouts in the Reds organization.


Can we find a little of some of these "types" of fans in ourselves at times? Comments? Any other clever or insightful categories?

Chip R
04-16-2008, 01:42 PM
Bob Boone fan: Blames anything and everything on Mike Brown...including the lack of scouts in the Reds organization.



I fixed that one for you. :)

Falls City Beer
04-16-2008, 01:44 PM
Sexual.

HumnHilghtFreel
04-16-2008, 01:46 PM
Is this guy insinuating that I actually can't hit better than Norris Hopper?!

Worst article ever!!!

GADawg
04-16-2008, 02:03 PM
ok so I wouldn't mind having Cody Ross back...btw don't need a good "base throwing" to make me feel better but I did like the quick hook from Lou last night and the disgusted look on his face when he did it.

LoganBuck
04-16-2008, 02:06 PM
He forgot

Psychoanalyst fan: Can tell how much heart each player has by looking at them on TV. Thinks that if player makes mistake and doesn't punch himself in the face he doesn't care about the team.

Dirty Shirt Fan: Cares about how dirty the players' uniforms are. Deducts players value from said opinion.

Fitness fan: Guy who thinks that if said player only lost twenty pounds he would play like his hair was on fire.

Tommyjohn25
04-16-2008, 02:11 PM
I'm definitely an "it's early fan". I also catch myself getting mad at certain players and calling them "horrible" and "useless", although I never say I could do better.


Unless it's Juan Castro....

VR
04-16-2008, 02:15 PM
In a just a few sentences, this person has perfectly profiled RedsZone. :beerme:

Spring~Fields
04-16-2008, 02:17 PM
Frustrated fan, where common goals of excellence are continually blocked, becoming goal blocking, then apathy is soon to follow that fan.

Delusional fan, where the cry is player X, Y, or Z is something, something special, somehow more than what they have shown themselves to be over and over even in the face of comparing players X, Y, or Z to other major league performers who clearly show that player X, Y, or Z is nothing special and delusional fan will fight to the death to hang on to that bias and confirmation bias support for players X, Y, or Z.

Hm, makes me think of Freel, Hopper, Castro, Hatteberg, Ross, Valetin, Encarcion, Patterson and yes even the volatile and frequented conversation piece and lightning rod Adam Dunn.

JinAZ
04-16-2008, 02:21 PM
*SABR guy: Pulls out a stat category 99.4326 % of fans have never heard of like VORP or MLVr to explain the problem.

That's me...though I'm such an elitist that I avoid Baseball Prospectus stats like the plague at this point!
-j

top6
04-16-2008, 02:24 PM
*SABR guy: Pulls out a stat category 99.4326 % of fans have never heard of like VORP or MLVr to explain the problem.
This is funny. I just love how someone who has the enviable job of talking about sports for a living chooses to make fun of stats instead of trying to explain them, even though they are actually sort of easy to understand for anyone with a high school education. This is probably why I never hear or care about anything Lance says except when it is posted on the internet tubes or on, as Chris Welsh said last night, a "blogspot" or an "internet station."

That said, I am a "Mike Brown" and "told you so" fan.

Rojo
04-16-2008, 02:38 PM
This is funny. I just love how someone who has the enviable job of talking about sports for a living chooses to make fun of stats instead of trying to explain them, even though they are actually sort of easy to understand for anyone with a high school education. This is probably why I never hear or care about anything Lance says except when it is posted on the internet tubes or on, as Chris Welsh said last night, a "blogspot" or an "internet station."

That said, I am a "Mike Brown" and "told you so" fan.

Ya' know, he did make fun of lot of people.

bucksfan
04-16-2008, 02:45 PM
I'm certainly an "It's early" fan. Maybe a pinch of some of the others, but no major overreactions or anger here - following baseball is a fun thing for me.

jojo
04-16-2008, 02:50 PM
That's me...though I'm such an elitist that I avoid Baseball Prospectus stats like the plague at this point!
-j

As you should in a great many cases.... :cool:

vaticanplum
04-16-2008, 02:57 PM
I don't think I'm any of these. Must be either bipolar or lackadaisical.

KittyDuran
04-16-2008, 03:39 PM
I don't think I'm any of these. Must be either bipolar or lackadaisical.Same here... and in my case it's probably because I'm lackadaisical or I enjoy baseball too much to get so worked up over it. :)

Spring~Fields
04-16-2008, 10:09 PM
I am the delusional one. I keep believing that things are going to be better each new day in Redsland. :bang: Now that is making me frustrated. :runaway:

*BaseClogger*
04-16-2008, 10:52 PM
*It's early fan: Points out there are still 148 games left, the bats will heat up when the weather does, says to look at the back of their baseball card.

*Look ahead fan: Already wondering about free class of 2009 and if the Reds can make a run at Derek Lowe.

*Line-up fan: Believes Reds troubles begin with the batting order and insists moving a guy up or down three spots in batting order will fix the problem. Points to the success of Tony LaRussa and the Cardinals.

*SABR guy: Pulls out a stat category 99.4326 % of fans have never heard of like VORP or MLVr to explain the problem.

*Fire manager fan: Fire Dusty and see if Sparky Andersonwants to come back...if not...hire Billy Bean's AAA manager.

OldRightHander
04-16-2008, 11:20 PM
or I enjoy baseball too much to get so worked up over it. :)

I think that's me. I just love this game. Even when the Reds aren't playing I will scan the XM to find other games to listen to. I will watch just about any game on tv, no matter who's playing. I have caught myself stopping at fields when I noticed they were having little league games going on and I figured I had enough time to stop and watch a few innings before continuing on down the road. (I just did that today up in Michigan.)

I love the game. I have seen parts of all of those in me over the years, but never to that degree. While the game is going on I will be completely immersed in it, but when it's over it's over and I have a life to get back to. I will criticize the manager's moves or a certain players performance, but in the end I realize that baseball is a sport and sports as a whole is a form of entertainment, a bit of a respite from the daily grind. If you ask me what time it is during a baseball game, I'm likely to tell you what inning it is. I enjoy remembering the good times, the good teams or great games I've been to, but I generally always look forward. The Reds have a bad game. There's tomorrow. It's a bad season. There's always next season. A pitcher gets rocked one inning. He'll get it together and settle down next inning. A hitter looks bad one AB. He'll make some adjustments and take one downtown the next time he's up. I'm just the eternal optimist. Sure I get disappointed by the way the team plays at times, but baseball is still a passion with me and nothing will ever be able to dampen that.

*BaseClogger*
04-16-2008, 11:22 PM
I have caught myself stopping at fields when I noticed they were having little league games going on and I figured I had enough time to stop and watch a few innings before continuing on down the road. (I just did that today up in Michigan.)

Finally got some good weather here... :cool:

OldRightHander
04-16-2008, 11:28 PM
Finally got some good weather here... :cool:

Finally. I was around Kalamazoo earlier today and it was quite nice. I'm back in Ohio now. Just did an easy run down to Dayton. It's always nice to get a run back home. My wife has to work early so she's already in bed, but I've been doing so many all night runs lately that I'm finding it hard to go to bed early.

*BaseClogger*
04-16-2008, 11:31 PM
Finally. I was around Kalamazoo earlier today and it was quite nice. I'm back in Ohio now. Just did an easy run down to Dayton. It's always nice to get a run back home. My wife has to work early so she's already in bed, but I've been doing so many all night runs lately that I'm finding it hard to go to bed early.

We were about due for some good weather. it has been in the 20's/30's each morning in the last couple of weeks I think.

I can't go to bed early either. Has something to do with being a senior in HS and baseball season... :D

OldRightHander
04-17-2008, 12:08 AM
I can't go to bed early either. Has something to do with being a senior in HS and baseball season... :D

Thanks for making me feel old. I had my 20th reunion last summer.

jojo
04-17-2008, 02:44 AM
Here's one:

*beer goggle*fan.... at times they find it difficult to valuate any performance related to their team without a significant bias as flaws are glossed over while positives get significant grade inflation. When they encounter a discussion with a harsher view of a player or a more critical opinion of said team, they might morph into *you're not a fan* fan...

vaticanplum
04-17-2008, 09:49 AM
I think that's me. I just love this game. Even when the Reds aren't playing I will scan the XM to find other games to listen to. I will watch just about any game on tv, no matter who's playing. I have caught myself stopping at fields when I noticed they were having little league games going on and I figured I had enough time to stop and watch a few innings before continuing on down the road. (I just did that today up in Michigan.)

I love the game. I have seen parts of all of those in me over the years, but never to that degree. While the game is going on I will be completely immersed in it, but when it's over it's over and I have a life to get back to. I will criticize the manager's moves or a certain players performance, but in the end I realize that baseball is a sport and sports as a whole is a form of entertainment, a bit of a respite from the daily grind. If you ask me what time it is during a baseball game, I'm likely to tell you what inning it is. I enjoy remembering the good times, the good teams or great games I've been to, but I generally always look forward. The Reds have a bad game. There's tomorrow. It's a bad season. There's always next season. A pitcher gets rocked one inning. He'll get it together and settle down next inning. A hitter looks bad one AB. He'll make some adjustments and take one downtown the next time he's up. I'm just the eternal optimist. Sure I get disappointed by the way the team plays at times, but baseball is still a passion with me and nothing will ever be able to dampen that.

I love that attitude, but I don't think pessimists love the game any less. They just have a different way of looking at things. Some of the greatest baseball fans I know rant through most games precisely because they love it so much. Because at the heart of it, they love it and want to see the game at its best. It's a personality thing.

RedsManRick
04-17-2008, 10:31 AM
Grass is Greener Fan Nothing their team does is ever good enough, there's always somebody else doing it better. Similarly, any success another organization has is further evidence of the complete ineptitude of their team. All players on said fans team have counterparts who are more productive, cheaper, and care more about the game.

KronoRed
04-17-2008, 02:48 PM
I think we have 3 or 4 of each around here :lol: