Quote:
Originally Posted by Caveat Emperor
Here is evidence that'd kill you at a trial:
1. You were in a car that likely smelled like alcohol.
2. You likely admitted you'd been at a bar.
3. You likely admitted to the officers you had been drinking.
4. You couldn't recall how many drinks you had consumed.
5. You fell asleep at the wheel of your car while at a red light.
6. You had difficulty maintaining balance when exiting the vehicle.
7. You refused a chemical test which could have cleared your name and proved you were legal to drive.
Put yourself in the shoes of a juror. What's the most likely explanation for all of those facts?
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My defense:
1. The car smelled like alcohol because there was someone in my car who was literally doused in beer earlier in the evening.
2. Yes, I was at a bar. I'm at the same bar, every Monday, because I play a gig there.
3. I never told the police I was drinking.
4. I don't know exactly how many drinks it was, but I know it was two or three, likely three.
5. Yes, I did. I was exhausted from the night before, and when my blood sugar gets low, it's very normal for me to become even more tired. I have been in several comas, actually.
6. Yes, I have torn ligaments in my knee that require surgery.
7. I refused the test because a lawyer told me to. Had I known it would've ended up like this, I would have accepted.
. . . and I have witnesses and proof for pretty much all of this.