You're telling me you would take Calhoun or Self over Cal? That's nuts, IMO. I wouldn't take Cryin' Roy either but you can at least make a decent argument for Roy.
Calhoun: two titles to his credit. Also produced some pretty good quality NBA players.
Bill Self: One title (against Cal) and also an impressive recruiter. He is the complete package. In the national title against Cal, he clearly outcoached him. Self is also younger I believe.
Until Cal wins a title, he isn't going to be in the elite status. He is just like Pitino as a coach. He can recruit and can sell ice to eskimos, but when the game is on the line, sometimes he makes the wrong decisions.