But anyone who expected Carpenter to retaliate Saturday should have heard him talk about the effect of the fight on his two children, Sam, 8, and Ava, 5. Carpenter said Ava talks about the brawl all the time, probably mentioned it five or six times during the spring, even knows Cueto’s name. As for Sam, Carpenter says, “How do you explain that to your 8-year-old son? You’re in this big, huge brawl. ‘Why is that, Daddy? Why are you fighting with everyone?’ It’s difficult to explain.”
Carpenter concludes: “It’s not what baseball is, not what baseball is about.”
"Well you see Sammy, it all started back in 2003, about the time your were conceived. Daddy was a mediocre pitcher, who...despite being in the prime years of his career, was a sub .500 starter going nowhere. I suffered an injury which should have ended my career. But, instead of having to get a real job like being an accountant, teacher, or coach....I signed with the Cardinals and starting doing rehab. During my rehab the trainers introduced me to this really cool magic substance during that 2003 season. And guess what Sammy? Not only was I able to play again, but suddenly....I was one of the most dominant players in all of baseball. Why, I could suddenly strike guys out whenever I needed to, throw more innings than I ever had when I was young, and stop walking guys or giving up homers. It was miraculous Sammy!
Well, Sammy...there is one bad side to go along with the improved numbers, huge paychecks and daddy's suddenly big muscles. I became a bonafied jackwagon. Yes, daddy just said jackwagon. So, included with that receding hairine and gigantic feet and head....daddy also has a little temper. So, I not only was at the core of why the brawl started...but I just had to get out there because I have this burning anger within me, but as I tell you all at home, the magic cream made me do it.
And that Sammy.....is how daddy got into the brawl.