My opinion is that the board needs some outside help. Perhaps we could grab a veteran poster or two from Sam Horn. Maybe have an English teacher teach rhetoric as a voluntary practice for those that really need it. We could also have a logician come in to explain cause and effect, a mathematician explain statistics and small sample sizes, and a historian come in to teach about how history often repeats itself.
I know it may be cost prohibitive, but, really, Redszone needs to kick it in gear. We came into this with a couple phenomenal seasons, but have coasted for years. It's time to get in shape.
Perhaps we could run in the sand with Apollo Creed?
Oh, and strikeouts suck because my Little League coach told me so!
(Having said that, I will fully admit watching Jay Bruce hit is really frustrating. He reminds me of Adam Dunn and Austin Kearns, in that he's productive, but far less productive than it seems as if he should be. Appearances and all that, I suppose.)