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Thread: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

  1. #1
    They call me "chef"
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    Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    I'll start it off...

    Arrive on time to the stadium before each game.
    Quote Originally Posted by dougdirt
    Guys, just stop arguing with him. He will literally never stop.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sea Ray
    Larry is living the role of the underachiever who's still struggling to get a life so he spends hours upon hours posting worthless bilge on the 'net
    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo!
    I think those are just two separate quotes and not meant to be taken together.

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  3. #2
    Member marcshoe's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Wipe off the table in the meeting room and push in the chairs after the Reds' board gets together.
    "What would your feelings be, seriously, if your cat or your dog began to talk to you, and to dispute with you in human accents? You would be overwhelmed with horror. I am sure of it. And if the roses in your garden sang a weird song, you would go mad." --Arthur Machen

  4. #3
    RaisorZone Raisor's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    pick up cuban cigars in Toronto when he visits
    "But I do know Joey's sister indirectly (or foster sister) and I have heard stories of Joey being into shopping, designer wear, fancy coffees, and pedicures."

  5. #4
    Oy Vey! Red in Chicago's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    barista

  6. #5
    Member Crumbley's Avatar
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    I'll tell you one thing they don't pay him to do: walk.

    I'll tell you another thing they don't pay him to do: clog the clubhouse drains with his fancy imported hair gel.

  7. #6
    breath westofyou's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Explain hockey to the Latin players

  8. #7
    breath westofyou's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Produce Canadian versions of all JTM products using moose, beaver and buffalo

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  10. #8
    Oy Vey! Red in Chicago's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Quote Originally Posted by westofyou View Post
    Produce Canadian versions of all JTM products using moose, beaver and buffalo
    "nice beaver" - leslie nielsen - naked gun

  11. #9
    They call me "chef"
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    To speak American at all times
    Quote Originally Posted by dougdirt
    Guys, just stop arguing with him. He will literally never stop.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sea Ray
    Larry is living the role of the underachiever who's still struggling to get a life so he spends hours upon hours posting worthless bilge on the 'net
    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo!
    I think those are just two separate quotes and not meant to be taken together.

  12. #10
    High five! nate's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Translate scouting reports on the Blue Jays from Canadian to American.
    "Bring on Rod Stupid!"

  13. #11
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    get on base

  14. #12
    Stat Wanker Hodiernus RedsManRick's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Bring the fancy coffee.
    Games are won on run differential -- scoring more than your opponent. Runs are runs, scored or prevented they all count the same. Worry about scoring more and allowing fewer, not which positions contribute to which side of the equation or how "consistent" you are at your current level of performance.

  15. #13
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Did someone say something that sparked this?

  16. #14
    breath westofyou's Avatar
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    Quote Originally Posted by Tony Cloninger View Post
    Did someone say something that sparked this?
    http://cincinnati.com/blogs/daughert...ng-line-416-3/

    AS FOR THE MECHANIC... i.e. Votto. Anyone else think heís simply being too fine up there? Vottoís eye is unmatched, unless itís by his patience. But there are times to be patient, and there are times to hack. You do not want your $17 Mil Man up there w/RISP, walking all the time. He is not paid to lead the world in OBP. Itís a nice facet of his game. Itís not what will keep the offense humming. Maybe when presented with a chance to drive in a few, Votto can swing at that belt-high fastball an inch off the plat

  17. #15
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    Re: Things the Reds pay Joey Votto to do

    I remember in 1985...Parker got off to a slow start through April. Had a .300 Average, when i still thought BA meant more....but he was not driving anyone in...and I said to my friend "Parker was brought in to drive in runs." Well..he did...and big time that year, but it helped that Milner and Redus started getting on base in front of him and they moved Davey down in the order.


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