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Thread: Girls are Evil

  1. #196
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    dbl post
    Last edited by GAC; 01-03-2004 at 05:29 PM.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

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  3. #197
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Originally posted by MWM
    Phil, Phil, Phil...........

    You're thinking with the wrong head!!!!!!!!!!!

    You're going to need Constanza to get you out of this one.
    Are we thinking of that same Seinfeld episode where Jerry had the problems with the two girls, and George suggested a three-way (and I'm not talking Skyline)?

    Jerry.... "BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE AN ORGY GUY! I'll have to change the way I dress, redecorate the apartment, put in some strobe lights. Naw! Too much work."

    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  4. #198
    Pre-tty, pre-tty good!! MWM's Avatar
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    JERRY: So the roommate laughed at everything I said.

    GEORGE: Wow.

    JERRY: It was a great sounding laugh too, kind of lilting and feminine--none of
    those big coarse "ha's." You know those?

    GEORGE: Oh yeah: HA-A-A, HA-A-A.

    JERRY: Yeah.

    GEORGE: Hate the big coarse "ha." Hate those.

    JERRY: And the worst part of course is that she also possessed many of the
    other qualities prized by the Superficial Man.

    GEORGE: I see.

    JERRY: So as you can see, I've got a bit of a problem here.

    GEORGE: Well, if I hear you correctly--and I think that I do--my advice to you
    is to finish your meal, pay your check, leave here, and never mention
    this to anyone again.

    JERRY: Can't be done, huh?

    GEORGE: The Switch?

    JERRY: "The Switch."

    GEORGE: Can't be done.

    JERRY: I wonder.

    GEORGE: Do you realize in the entire history of western civilization no one has
    successfully accomplished the Roommate Switch? In the Middle Ages you
    could get locked up for even suggesting it!

    JERRY: They didn't have roommates in the Middle Ages.

    GEORGE: Well, I'm sure at some point between the years 800 and
    1200--somewhere--there were two women living together.

    JERRY: The point is I intend to undertake this. And I'll do it with or without
    you. So if you're scared, if you haven't got the stomach for this, let's
    get it out right now! And I'll go on my own. If not, you can get on
    board and we can get to work! Now what's it going to be?

    GEORGE: All right, dammit, I'm in.

    JERRY: I couldn't do it without you.

    GEORGE: All right. Let's get to work.
    Now just insert "best friend" in place of roommate and you have the same situation.

    Anyone remember Goerge's solution?


    :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin:
    Last edited by MWM; 01-03-2004 at 05:25 PM.
    Grape works as a soda. Sort of as a gum. I wonder why it doesn't work as a pie. Grape pie? There's no grape pie. - Larry David

  5. #199
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Originally posted by MWM
    Now just insert "best friend" in place of roommate and you have the same situation.

    Anyone remember Goerge's solution?


    :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin:
    Wasn't that the three way?

    What do you call that? mena "something"
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  6. #200
    RaisorZone Raisor's Avatar
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    Originally posted by GAC
    Wasn't that the three way?

    What do you call that? mena "something"

    If I recall correctly, they were "in to it".

    So, now I got THAT going for me :hat:
    "But I do know Joey's sister indirectly (or foster sister) and I have heard stories of Joey being into shopping, designer wear, fancy coffees, and pedicures."

  7. #201
    Pre-tty, pre-tty good!! MWM's Avatar
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    Well, since you asked, here it is:
    GEORGE: All right. Let's go over it again, one more time.

    JERRY: All right. So I tell Sandy that I want to have a ménage à trois with her
    and her roommate.

    GEORGE: That's right.

    JERRY: And you believe this course of action will have a two-pronged effect.
    Firstly, the very mention of the idea will cause Sandy to recoil in
    disgust, whereupon she will insist that I remove myself from the
    premises.

    GEORGE: Keep going.

    JERRY: At this point, it is inevitable that she will seek out the roommate to
    apprise her of this abhorrent turn of events.

    GEORGE: Continue.

    JERRY: The roommate will then offer her friend the requisite sympathy even as
    part of her cannot help but feel somewhat flattered by her inclusion in
    the unusual request.

    {George takes over.}

    GEORGE: A few days go by and a call is placed at a time when Sandy is known to
    be busy at work. Once the initial awkwardness is relieved with a little
    playful humor, which she [Laura] of course cannot resist, an invitation
    to a friendly dinner is proffered.

    JERRY: Huh. Well, it all sounds pretty good. There's only one flaw in it:
    They're roommates. She'd have to go out with me behind Sandy's back.
    She's not gonna do that.

    {Another pregnant pause. George?}

    GEORGE: You disappoint me, my friend. Sandy wants nothing to do with you. She
    tells Laura, "If you want to waste your time with that pervert, that's
    your problem."

    {Final pause. Jerry?}

    JERRY: It's a perfect plan. So inspired. So devious. Yet so simple.

    GEORGE: {George, finger in the peanut butter jar}: This is what I do.
    Grape works as a soda. Sort of as a gum. I wonder why it doesn't work as a pie. Grape pie? There's no grape pie. - Larry David

  8. #202
    Member TeamCasey's Avatar
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    Raisor ...... did you ever consider that you may be Amanda's Katie? Something to ponder.

    If you add one more girl in here, I'm calling out the rule of three and sending you some super glue.
    "I've never understood the term "women and children" as if their lives are somewhat more important than men."

  9. #203
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    This doesn't look like Phil though

    Last edited by GAC; 01-03-2004 at 06:05 PM.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  10. #204
    RaisorZone Raisor's Avatar
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    Originally posted by TeamCasey
    Raisor ...... did you ever consider that you may be Amanda's Katie? Something to ponder.


    Well, until yesterday, she had been after this other dude we know (though he and I have lots in common. Amanda likes nerds)

    If you add one more girl in here, I'm calling out the rule of three and sending you some super glue.

    Well, there IS Ashleigh out there.

    :evilgrin:
    "But I do know Joey's sister indirectly (or foster sister) and I have heard stories of Joey being into shopping, designer wear, fancy coffees, and pedicures."

  11. #205
    Hey Cubs Fans RFS62's Avatar
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    Alright, I just got off the phone with my agent, and NBC and CBS are in competition for our daytime drama.

    We start shooting the pilot next month, and we need a title. So far, the working titles are:

    All my Philness

    The not so bold, and the beautiful

    As the Phil turns

    Days of our Phil

    Also, we're having a casting call, so I'd like some suggestions for who gets to play the major parts. As is customary, CQ and I will be holding "special" casting "appointments" with all the hot female leads out there.


    :smokin:
    "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
    ~ Mark Twain

  12. #206
    Member CougarQuest's Avatar
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    Now folks, there is a true friend!!! He included me without even consulting me!
    Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

  13. #207
    Score Early, Score Often gonelong's Avatar
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    Originally posted by GAC
    Wasn't that the three way?

    What do you call that? mena "something"
    inside joke: We always referred to it as "The Manager of Detroit" ... as in ...

    "wonder if those 2 gals are Tiger fans, I'd love to introduce them to Alan Trammel".

    Thats about 2/3 of what I learned in college.

    GL

  14. #208
    Administrator Boss-Hog's Avatar
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    I thought you guys might be interested in the new picture Phil sent me that he referred to above:

    http://www.redszone.com/forums/showt...711#post262711

  15. #209
    Hey Cubs Fans RFS62's Avatar
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    The plot thickens...
    "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
    ~ Mark Twain

  16. #210
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Boss-Hog
    I thought you guys might be interested in the new picture Phil sent me that he referred to above:

    http://www.redszone.com/forums/showt...711#post262711
    So Phil is really Charlie... and those are his angels.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations


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