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Thread: How many 5 year olds ...

  1. #16
    The wino and I know bucksfan's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    The only thing more funny than this question is the amount of time I have spent contemplating my serious answer, which has still resulted in no solid answer except that it is probably lower than I believe it to be!
    "I'm virtually free to do whatever I want, but I try to remember so is everybody else..." - Todd Snider

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  3. #17
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    as well as a certified axe fighter
    Where does one get this certification? Is there a sanctioning body?
    The widow is gathering nettles for her children's dinner; a perfumed seigneur, delicately lounging in the Oeil de Boeuf, hath an alchemy whereby he will extract the third nettle and call it rent. ~ Carlyle

  4. #18
    Smells Like Teen Spirit jmcclain19's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Rojo
    Where does one get this certification? Is there a sanctioning body?
    Axe Fighters.....of......America??

  5. #19
    Smells Like Teen Spirit jmcclain19's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Ok, so you can't touch a wall, but what happens when the little swarm of locusts push you in that direction?

    Are you out immediately

    i'm blocked at work from looking at that thread, so I don't know if it's been brought up, but could I, for example, use a fat kid as a bat?

    I think 30-40 sounds unreasonable, just due to the shear weight of all those kids.

    Lets say I pick up Fatty McGee and start swinging him around, I could take out a good number, but it still doesn't preclude 10 other kids knocking me over by just bom rushing me from a blindside.

    And as TC said, they have teeth, and at that age, would use 'em.

    Maybe if I kicked a few kids in the nuts early on, intimidation would be a factor?

    And bucksfan is correct, the premise is hilarious, I've been sitting here for 25-30 minutes figuring out a strategy.

  6. #20
    Cruisin' for trouble
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Maybe if I kicked a few kids in the nuts early on, intimidation would be a factor?
    You'd have to have pretty good aim. Those suckers are the size of raisins at that age and trying to get your foot in there takes a lot of effort.

    Believe me.

  7. #21
    Smells Like Teen Spirit jmcclain19's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by GoReds
    You'd have to have pretty good aim. Those suckers are the size of raisins at that age and trying to get your foot in there takes a lot of effort.

    Believe me.
    Well, I'm guessing the size of my foot, if I get it in the area, could at least put a little fear into 'em.

    But then again, if I'm rearing up to really kick some kid in the jewels, that's when 5 of them could be coming around my backside to jump on me.

  8. #22
    Member ochre's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    I think this has the makings of the next "great" reality show.

    Reality because, you know, this type of stuff happens all the time right?
    4009



  9. #23
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by ochre
    I think this has the makings of the next "great" reality show.

    Reality because, you know, this type of stuff happens all the time right?
    I don't know if it will happen or not, but I'm sure it's something TV execs have been "kicking around".

    :MandJ:

  10. #24
    Cruisin' for trouble
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    A very sick coworker just thought of something - eye gouges.

    That could be a very effective method.

  11. #25
    Churlish Johnny Footstool's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    The average 5 year old weighs 45 lbs.

    Ten of them together = 450 lbs.

    Twenty of them = 900 lbs.

    I doubt anyone could withstand a bum rush of 20 of those little buggers.

    At the very least, they would push you into a wall, causing you to violate the rules of the contest and lose by default.
    "I prefer books and movies where the conflict isn't of the extreme cannibal apocalypse variety I guess." Redsfaithful

  12. #26
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Question about the rules - does the 'wall' rule go both ways? If you sling a kid or 10 into the wall, does that knock them out of the competition?

    Final question - I know that death is not the objective, but is there a penalty?

  13. #27
    Ripsnort wheels's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Ravenlord
    BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

    Be careful, man.

    I'm pretty awesome with a bowstaff. :MandJ:
    "We know we're better than this, but we can't prove it." - Tony Gwynn

  14. #28
    Ripsnort wheels's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Footstool
    The average 5 year old weighs 45 lbs.

    Ten of them together = 450 lbs.

    Twenty of them = 900 lbs.

    I doubt anyone could withstand a bum rush of 20 of those little buggers.

    At the very least, they would push you into a wall, causing you to violate the rules of the contest and lose by default.
    No way 20 of 'em could hit me at one time, at least from one side, and if they hit me from all sides, I'd pretty much have to stand my ground, or if I fell over I'd probably crush one or two of 'em.
    "We know we're better than this, but we can't prove it." - Tony Gwynn

  15. #29
    Pagan/Asatru Ravenlord's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Rojo
    Where does one get this certification? Is there a sanctioning body?
    Society for Creative Anachronism and Association for Renaissance Martial Arts. ARMA is really cool...whatever concept you have of ancient fighting arts, is totally wrong.
    the store for all your blade, costuming (in any regard), leather (also in any regard), and steel craft needs.www.facebook.com/tdhshop


    yes, this really is how we make our living.

  16. #30
    RaisorZone Raisor's Avatar
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    Re: How many 5 year olds ...

    The last time I was involved in something like this (1st rule of Fight Club is DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!), ummmm..


    Nevermind..
    "But I do know Joey's sister indirectly (or foster sister) and I have heard stories of Joey being into shopping, designer wear, fancy coffees, and pedicures."


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