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Thread: Favorite Michigan Football joke

  1. #1
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    Favorite Michigan Football joke

    This one is good, but there are awesome ones out there.


    Q: Why do University of Michigan fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
    A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

    Feel free to add your own
    Last edited by Sean_CaseyRules; 11-18-2005 at 03:20 PM.
    Let's make some noise!

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  3. #2
    Please come again pedro's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    John Cooper :
    Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

  4. #3
    Please come again pedro's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Q: How do you get an Ohio State Alumnus off your front porch?

    A: pay for your pizza.
    Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

  5. #4
    Puffy's Daddy Red Leader's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    In a freak accident involving the Buckeyes mascot, a video camera and a tube of KY Jelly, Jim Tressell died, and went to heaven. When he arrived, St. Peter was waiting for him. He began to show him around the neighborhood, and eventually reached his dwelling. It was a nice log cabin with an OSU flag out front. They continued walking and eventually reached a huge 3 story mansion with tons of U of M decor in the yard and on the house. Tressell gets angry, and looks over at St. Peter.

    "Why does Lloyd Carr get a mansion, while I’m stuck in a log cabin? Sure it’s nice, but he gets this? The guy can’t even lead his team to a bowl game victory for Christ sake!" Tressell yells.

    St. Peter replies, "Jim, that’s not Lloyd Carr’s house, that’s God’s."
    'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.'
    -Snoop on his retirement

    Your Mom is happy.

  6. #5
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Hang on to any of the new State of Ohio quarters. If you have them, they may be a collector’s item due it’s unique design. The U.S. Treasury Announced today that it is recalling all the Ohio quarters produced at OSU. Treasury Undersecretary Jack Shackleford said Monday..."This action is being taken after numerous reports that new Ohio quarters will not work in parking meters, toll booths, vending machines, pay phones or other coin-operated devices." Shackleford continued on .. "The problem lies in the design of the Ohio quarter, created by a top-notched Ohio State University graduate student. Apparently, the duct tape holding the two dimes and the nickel together keeps jamming the coin-operated devices.
    'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.'
    -Snoop on his retirement

    Your Mom is happy.

  7. #6
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Why do birds fly upside-down over Columbus?
    Cause it ain’t worth a crap
    'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.'
    -Snoop on his retirement

    Your Mom is happy.

  8. #7
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    A Buckeye and Spartan fan were walking in the forest one day. They saw a set of tracks and started arguing over what kind of tracks they were.

    The Buckeye fan said, "I think they’re deer tracks!"

    The Spartan fan said, "I think they’re dog tracks!"

    They were still arguing when the train hit them
    'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.'
    -Snoop on his retirement

    Your Mom is happy.

  9. #8
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Q: How many pallbearers would be needed for a OSU alumni funeral?

    A: Two. A garbage can only has two handles.
    'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.'
    -Snoop on his retirement

    Your Mom is happy.

  10. #9
    Resident optimist OldRightHander's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    The UM library burned down the other day. All 13 books were destroyed and 10 of them hadn't even been colored in yet.

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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    What are the best 3 years of a Michigan football player's life?

    His freshman year.
    "Strickland Propane... Taste the meat, not the heat." - Hank Hill

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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them
    Let's make some noise!

  13. #12
    Please come again pedro's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Quote Originally Posted by Sean_CaseyRules
    Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them

    exactly. or Georgia/ Georgia tech etc etc.

    I may use a few of them on the Oregon fans out here just to rib them.
    Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

  14. #13
    Resident optimist OldRightHander's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Quote Originally Posted by Sean_CaseyRules
    Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them
    I say let both sides fire away. All in good fun.

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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    Quote Originally Posted by OldRightHander
    I say let both sides fire away. All in good fun.

    I should've been thinking that way in the first place.
    Let's make some noise!

  16. #15
    For a Level Playing Field RedFanAlways1966's Avatar
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    Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke

    OSU potty training....
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Small market fan... always hoping, but never expecting.


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