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Thread: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

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  1. #1
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Whether it is being accident prone or just plan doing stupid stuff.... these guys have nothing on the GACster.

    I spent 3 hours at the ER yesterday with 1st degree burns over most of my face (top layer of skin gone) and my left arm. My hair line is pushed back a bit too.

    I was trying to get my push mower running, which hadn't been used since last year. It wouldn't fire. So I drained what gas was in there (figured it was bad), changed the plug and air filter. Still it wouldn't fire.

    I had been using the pliable push prime button on the side, but didn't smell gas, so I knew it couldn't be flooded. It seemed to me that it just wasn't getting any fire/spark from the plug. But I put a new plug in.

    So I was trying everything. I decided to hold open the butterfly on the carb, to see if it was getting gas while my son hit the switch.

    That is the last thing I remember.

    How or what happened I do not know. And believe me, I've had plenty of time since yesterday running this situation through my mind, and trying to figure out what caused it.

    But flames shot up into my face, and I wasn't directly over the carb either or it could have been worse, and the entire top of the lawnmower motor caught on fire. My wife (who was in the house) and the neighbor (who was out in his yard) said they heard an explosion. I didn't hear anything.... I just SAW. And it happened so fast, and I was on the ground.

    My wife, when she heard it, immediately thought "What has the idiot done now?" .... she knows me folks. She's been married to me almost 25 years.

    I was in the far back part of the yard so she didn't see what had happened to me until I started getting closer to here. When she saw me, she just about had a heart attack. The pain wasn't that bad because I think I was going into shock.

    Anyway, we got to the ER and I walked up to the counter and the nurse said "Can I help you?" Now folks, if you could see me, and believe me it's not a pretty sight - and some would say that even before the accident - why would anyone, especially an ER nurse say "Can I help you?" (implying what's wrong).

    Since I seem to always use humor in almost every situation, I almost said "Yeah, I stubbed my toe!"

    Finally, a couple more nurses came over, saw my situation, gasped, and said we are gonna have to clear a stall.

    5 minutes later I see them wheeling out a guerney from a room, with what I am assuming is a body on it because the sheets were pulled up over the head.

    I immediately thought to myself "I hope no one comes in after me!"

    They immediately started putting cold compresses on my entire face and left arm. Then every 10 minutes they'd come in and dribble cold water over it. The pain level was at it's height, so they started an IV for fluids, and started giving me morphine. They ended up, I think, giving me 17 mgs before I started to stabilize.

    When the Dr came in, he explained the severity of the situation and said that while my pain is enormous, and it looks bad, it is not as severe as it could have been.

    They applied this silver sulfadiazine cream and non-adhesive dressings to the affected areas - my 10 year old said I looked like the Mummy - gave me an ample supply of the same and how/when to use it.

    They then contacted my family physician, whom I have to go in and see this morning.

    Oh yeah - and I can't forget the Percocet. Thank God for percocet! But I started feeling alot better last night. The pain really subsided. I have alot of blisters on my arm, ears, and neck though. And my face is pretty raw red.

    The worse part was getting up this morning and having to remove the dressings and then shave off what was left of my beard. Fortunately, that region didn't get it as bad as from my nose up. I didn't have to worry about my eye lashes and eye brows. It reminded me of that Seinfeld episode where Uncle Leo lost his and Elaine drew them back on.

    But I've always had a beard, so it came as quite a surprise to my kids this morning. My 10 yr old said "Wow Dad, you look strange".

    I said "Take a good look son. It's the face of stupidity, and you better hope it's not genetic."

    But the Doc said it may look bad, but I'll be back to normal in about 2 weeks.

    And then my wife, after realizing I am going to be OK, injects "Maybe you should have set yourself on fire years ago then."
    Last edited by GAC; 10-09-2006 at 06:57 AM.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  2. #2
    Hey Cubs Fans RFS62's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Holy crap, GAC!!!!!!

    I know it's awful and you're in a lot of pain and discomfort, but you're lucky it wasn't much worse.

    Think the moles might have booby trapped the lawnmower?
    "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
    ~ Mark Twain

  3. #3
    For a Level Playing Field RedFanAlways1966's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    GAC... holy. I am glad that you will be okay. I have always said that there is nothing more painful than a burn and I am sure you can testify to that. You and your "household fires"... you gotta stop this!

    I said "Take a good look son. It's the face of stupidity, and you better hope it's not genetic."
    LMAO. Humor is always the best medicine. Funny!

    Good thing this happened in the offseason! Take care of yourself.
    Small market fan... always hoping, but never expecting.

  4. #4
    Bunn-O-matic max venable's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    GAC...you gonna post a pic or your "new look?"

    Seriously...I'm glad you're okay.
    For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.

  5. #5
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Quote Originally Posted by max venable View Post
    GAC...you gonna post a pic or your "new look?"

    Seriously...I'm glad you're okay.
    I had my daughter take a couple pics of me, but they'll never see the light of day on here.

    I sent them to rfs. So you'll have to take his word if he offers it - I look bad. It would make most Post Office pics of the Most Wanted look like models.
    Last edited by GAC; 10-09-2006 at 10:02 AM.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  6. #6
    Davey BuckWoody's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Day-um!

    I'm glad that everything will end up being OK. A great sense of humor is an indispensable thing to have...good to see you have that going for you still. Take care and stay away from power tools and flammable liquids!

  7. #7
    Churlish Johnny Footstool's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    I'm glad you're okay. You easily could have been blinded or worse. Someone was looking out for you -- your guardian angel must be working overtime.
    "I prefer books and movies where the conflict isn't of the extreme cannibal apocalypse variety I guess." Redsfaithful

  8. #8
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Footstool View Post
    I'm glad you're okay. You easily could have been blinded or worse. Someone was looking out for you -- your guardian angel must be working overtime.
    Oh yeah. If I had been bent down closer over the carb, who knows what would have happened. I might have lost more then my eyebrows.

    I'm still looking back on it today and trying figure out what caused it to flame up? It had to be a spark from somewhere IMO- but where?
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  9. #9
    2009: Fail Ltlabner's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Man...sorry to hear about this. Hope you recover quickly.

    BTW, would you be mad if I sat a few seats away from you if we go to GABP together next year?
    a super volcano of ridonkulous suckitude.

    I simply don't have access to a "cares about RBI" place in my psyche. There is a "mildly curious about OBI%" alcove just before the acid filled lake guarded by robot snipers with lasers which leads to the "cares about RBI" antechamber though. - Nate

  10. #10
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Getting burned on Sunday doesn't make falling out of the tree on Saturday look so bad.

    Samuel was sitting in a lawn chair taking a break and watching when I fell out of the tree.

    His exact words were... "Wow Dad! That was awesome! I wish I had the camera!"
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  11. #11
    Churlish Johnny Footstool's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    GAC, you've convinced me to stick to my own philosophy of fixing things -- pay someone else to do it.
    "I prefer books and movies where the conflict isn't of the extreme cannibal apocalypse variety I guess." Redsfaithful

  12. #12
    THAT'S A FACT JACK!! GAC's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Footstool View Post
    GAC, you've convinced me to stick to my own philosophy of fixing things -- pay someone else to do it.
    If I think it's gonna be a job that I can't do, then I'll hire someone too Johnny. But tinkering around with a push lawnmower, when there isn't much to them to begin with, and which I have done for many years - it didn't seem right taking it to someone.

    And anymore, it's hard to find people that do "handyman" jobs. They don't exist anymore.

    Maybe because they are dying off from accidents?

    I've got some big beautiful maple trees on my property (average height= 30 ft), but since that huge ice storm last winter, and the fact that no one was tending the yard while we were living elsewhere and rebuilding, they really needed trimming bad. I also had alot of dead branches.

    It would have cost me around $1500 to have a tree service come in and do the job. And I couldn't really afford it.

    I was at Lowes about 2 weeks ago and saw a Remington electric trimmer (saw w/ a telescopic pole) for $100. It reaches 15 ft. So I bought one, and for the last two weekends have been hitting it trimming the trees. And it's definitely hard work, which I am not afraid of. I finished up the last tree this weekend.

    I have 3 huge piles in the far corner of my lot.

    I was gonna burn them; but I think I'll pay to have somene haul them away.
    "panic" only comes from having real expectations

  13. #13
    Rally Onion! Chip R's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    Note to self: Do not buy any Hondas GAC has helped build.
    Glad you're OK. Remember, fire, bad.
    The Rally Onion wants 150 fans before Opening Day.

    http://www.facebook.com/pages/Rally-...24872650873160

  14. #14
    He has the Evil Eye! flyer85's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    "well if they don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy"

    Try duct tape next time or bigger explosives.

    Get well soon.
    What are you, people? On dope? - Mr Hand

  15. #15
    Member Coffeybro's Avatar
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    Re: Chevy Chase, Tim Allen, and Red Green Have Got Nothing On Me

    So Gac, everyone knows your a Reds fan but did you have to try and get a face to match the team. All kidding aside I'm glad your ok.
    There are 10 types of people in this world. Those that understand binary and those that don't.

    They wheeled a 3x4 steel safe into the clubhouse Sunday morning to store the players' valuables. It took four guys to lift it off a dolly and onto a table.

    Said pitcher Kent Mercker: "What's that, Junior Griffey's wallet?"


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