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Thread: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

  1. #16
    Making sense of it all Matt700wlw's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    I have records...and a record player....

    I'm serious. It's so cool

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  3. #17
    Please come again pedro's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by Matt700wlw View Post
    I have records...and a record player....

    I'm serious. It's so cool

    I do too but they're all boxed up. I've inherited a lot of stray albums through the years.

    Anybody need a copy of Brian Auger and the Oblivion Express?

    How 'bout some Wishbone Ash?

    Don't be shy
    Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

  4. #18
    Please come again pedro's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Oh, and you're getting some good advice Wheels. If you don't want back with don't go out solo with her.
    Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

  5. #19
    Making sense of it all Matt700wlw's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.


    I do too but they're all boxed up. I've inherited a lot of stray albums through the years.

    Anybody need a copy of Brian Auger and the Oblivion Express?

    How 'bout some Wishbone Ash?

    Don't be shy
    Mine's my parents....it was boxed up.

    I unboxed it.....their records too....lots of cool stuff they used to listen too

  6. #20
    Mon chou Choo vaticanplum's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ltlabner View Post
    More importantly, don't call her after you've been drinking. Bad, bad, idea. Juan Piere for long term contract bad.


    When FCB recommended not drinking, my first thought was, well go ahead and drink, but keep your friends with you and have them take away your phone. I'm sure that cell phones have saved a life here and there, but the amount of relationships destroyed makes that whole emergency-life-saving thing almost not seem worth it.

    You're probably getting plastered as I type this, wheels, and I wish I had advice for you but all I can think of first are questions. Why did you really feel you wanted to call her in the first place? If it was a good conversation, why did you decide to get together? Because it was casual enough that it felt friendly, or out of a sense of obligation or worry for her, or because maybe there's a part of you that wants a girlfriend again and she's the last one you remember? And I know you swear that you have no feelings for her anymore but I have to ask that of you again.

    You say that it's "bad to carry around crappy feelings", which is a good attitude to have, I think. But if you left your phone conversation not having crappy feelings, then you've taken care of that and are at perfect liberty to leave it there and keep with your philosophy. The post-conversation part seems to be what is causing you grief, so if you really feel that there are no hard feelings now, why is that the case? Well, you asked that yourself up there. I think you probably know the answer deep down somewhere, but it's getting buried in questions, actually.

    I'm going against what a lot of people say here, but if you continue to be this confused, I think it might be worth it TO YOU to see her once. DON'T DRINK. (I would say you can have one drink but one drink is never ever one drink.) I think seeing her once might give you an answer. Either you'll decide you still have feelings for her (doesn't sound likely, but who knows) or she for you (in which case you definitely need to not see her again), or everything will be fine and you'll relax about it and maybe even be friends, or she'll tick you off and you'll be reminded why you broke up and you'll have no desire to see her again. Sometimes bad feelings are good if they keep you away from people who are bad for you. So I do think it might be worth it to see her as you planned. Bear in mind, though, that this advice is coming from a person who had a six-year relationship wherein approximately 185 breakups took place. So while it seems clear to me that seeing her again could take care of everything one way or another, I'm quite aware that being in the middle of the situation rather muddles it. That's why I think you should listen to what you really know. Oh, instincts, they're called.

    With regard to tonight, though: seriously, dude, chill out about that. She called and asked if you had plans for THAT NIGHT. If she's abrupt for that reason then she's unreasonable, if you're worried about her being abrupt then you should know that there's nothing you can do to change someone that unreasonable, and if you read that as abrupt when she really wasn't at all then you are too easily worried and actually probably should drink more. Heed, heed the greatest advice of life: you cannot change other people. Change comes only from within. So listen to what you have to do here and do it, and whatever results from that will at least be something you've come by honestly. Remember that you are OUT of this relationship because it was causing you grief so any grief that comes from it now needs to be stopped before it gets a chance to start. I'm not saying that it automatically will be grief-addled, but I think you need to recognize whether it has that potential pretty early on.
    There is no such thing as a pitching prospect.

  7. #21
    Resident optimist OldRightHander's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    That's why I finally gave in and got married 5 years ago. Single life was too confusing. My dating life is much easier now because it's always the same person, every day ends with us in bed, and I never wonder who I'm waking up next to.

  8. #22
    Mon chou Choo vaticanplum's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Oh, and to address the other thread going on here, I have only a record player and no working CD player. Because I am that cool. And by "cool" I mean "really freaking broke".
    There is no such thing as a pitching prospect.

  9. #23
    Member Cedric's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Just remember the code. No way you can leave your friends tonight you wimp.

    Bros before hoes.

    And I'm joking, don't wanna be called a womanizer.
    This is the time. The real Reds organization is back.

  10. #24
    Ripsnort wheels's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Oh man....

    Thanks everyone for all the advice.

    I realized tonight that our whole relationship was based on.....I can't even explain it in one word.

    Maybe I was with her because it seemed like she was the only girl that actually understood what I was about.

    I collect records. Vinyl records.

    I read books that nobody else might understand.

    Finally, I had a girl that saw past what I lacked in the looks category, and dug me for who I was as a person.

    As it turned out, those very things that I thought were something of value, she trashed at every turn.

    Now I see my friends being hit on by girls, while I get ignored, and I wonder if I have any value to a woman at all.

    I don't.

    Simple as that.

    I'm meant to be alone for the rest of my life, and until I can grasp that I won't be happy.

    It really stinks being me.

    That's what I've learned.
    "We know we're better than this, but we can't prove it." - Tony Gwynn

  11. #25
    Baseball card addict MrCinatit's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Seriously, wheels, reading your post reminds me of me several years ago. It just sounds like you are getting hit with the same realization I did, but at a latter age.
    It might seem cruel, but there are many of us who are almost born to be outcasts - for whatever reason.
    Perhaps we are lacking in the looks category, perhaps we are emotionally stunted, perhaps we are afraid of having someone else invade our private spaces, perhaps we are pickey (or think we are), or all of the above, or something else.
    I've been one of those guys, and I've realized it for some 30 years (high school can be a brutal eduction). After many years of brutal rejection, I found it very difficult to open myself up to women - and when some did, I pushed them aside.
    When one woman finally did succeed in breaking down that wall, it was wonderful at first, but a remarkable disaster afterwards. It took me a while to get back on my feet again, but once I did - yeah, I built that old wall again.
    I'll have the occassional "casual" relationship here and there - but I no longer think I am capable of having a real, solid relationship.
    It can be a very lonely path to walk, Wheels - and not one I would recommend for all.


    And, as for the other part of the conversation - I believe my vinyle collection numbers in the 700s. Not all of it is good. Anyone fancy a listen to the Osmonds?

  12. #26
    Hisssssssss Yachtzee's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by wheels View Post
    Oh man....

    Thanks everyone for all the advice.

    I realized tonight that our whole relationship was based on.....I can't even explain it in one word.

    Maybe I was with her because it seemed like she was the only girl that actually understood what I was about.

    I collect records. Vinyl records.

    I read books that nobody else might understand.

    Finally, I had a girl that saw past what I lacked in the looks category, and dug me for who I was as a person.

    As it turned out, those very things that I thought were something of value, she trashed at every turn.

    Now I see my friends being hit on by girls, while I get ignored, and I wonder if I have any value to a woman at all.

    I don't.

    Simple as that.

    I'm meant to be alone for the rest of my life, and until I can grasp that I won't be happy.

    It really stinks being me.

    That's what I've learned.
    Wheels, you have to stop putting the (p-word) on a pedestal.
    Burn down the disco. Hang the blessed DJ. Because the music that he constantly plays, it says nothing to me about my life.

  13. #27
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    after reading all this and nothing personal to anyone who drinks but does everyone have to drink to have a good time? It seems this persons whole holiday time will be spent not remembering any of it so whats the point?

  14. #28
    Administrator GIK's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    wheels, many of us have been through similar experiences. Trust me...it'll work out in the end. Just have some fun with your buds right now and try not to think about her or what's next...just let it happen.

  15. #29
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by BUTLER REDSFAN View Post
    after reading all this and nothing personal to anyone who drinks but does everyone have to drink to have a good time? It seems this persons whole holiday time will be spent not remembering any of it so whats the point?
    This is a helpful post.

  16. #30
    I can do the Hully Gully IowaRed's Avatar
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    Re: Okay...So I'm a bundle of nerves.

    Quote Originally Posted by GIK View Post
    wheels, many of us have been through similar experiences. Trust me...it'll work out in the end. Just have some fun with your buds right now and try not to think about her or what's next...just let it happen.
    Amen, and be thankful that you have the friends around that you can go hang out with. Have fun
    More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.


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