Super Frosh Greg Oden is a Lottery pick. We are going to lose him unless we take drastic and immediate action. Greed usually slithers to the front in these situations. And frankly, with the options being going to school for free orrrr cashing in for Millions, who'd blame him. We live in a country that has become much more concerned about mutual funds than mutual orgasms.
I think we approach the superstar, and from what I hear a great guy, and offer to change the University's name to Oden State University throughout the rest of his basketball playing tenure. We won't even have to change the logo. OSU still remains on the uniforms and promotional gear. The state legislature simply agrees to enjoin the mostly ceremonious changes by appointing an Ad Hoc committee of 3 or 4 other nut-cases like myself. We recommend, they write the resolution and pass it, the Governor signs it and there will be unbridled happiness throughout Buckeye land. It will be alot cheaper than the Michican Route in the 90's. We won't have to buy a "Fab Five", we will save millions, with little sacrifice to this great state.