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Thread: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

  1. #1
    GR8NESS WMR's Avatar
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    Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    After being late for her court appearance to answer for charges of driving while her license was suspended, Paris Hilton was sentenced to 45 days in jail late this afternoon.
    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Aww...

    Why am I even posting to this thread...
    "There are people who don't like baseball? But... Baseball is the coolest thing ever!" -Zombie's 5 year old daughter.

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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Its not like she's going to be sent to a hardcore prison, it'll be like the one for Martha Stewart. That would be my guess.
    Let's make some noise!

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    Tired of talk. Win! Joseph's Avatar
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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    I hope they put her in with Pam Grier from the Big Birdcage.

    Championships for MY teams in my lifetime:
    Cincinnati Reds - 75, 76, 90
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    RZ Chamber of Commerce Unassisted's Avatar
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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    The first night's the toughest, no doubt about it. They march you in naked as the day you're born, fresh from a Bible reading, skin burning and half-blind from that delousing **** they throw on you... and when they put you in that cell, when those bars slam home, that's when you know it's for real. Old life blown away in the blink of an eye... a long cold season in hell stretching out ahead...nothing left but all the time in the world to think about it. Most new fish come close to madness the first night. Somebody always breaks down crying. Happens every time. The only question is, who's it gonna be?
    /r/reds

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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    What Paris can expect behind bars

    LOS ANGELES - Hopefully, Paris Hilton likes chicken. She was sentenced Friday to 45 days at the Century Regional Detention Center, Los Angeles County's jailhouse for women just south of downtown in Lynwood.

    Inmates there get three low-sodium meals a day, with dinner the only hot meal. Beef and pork aren't permitted "it's all poultry-based," said Capt. Alice Scott, who oversees the 2,200-inmate facility she describes as "a very nice place."

    Like other high-profile Los Angeles County inmates O.J. Simpson,
    Robert Blake, Robert Mitchum, Sirhan Sirhan and Charles Manson Hilton will be segregated from the general population for her own safety, living in a one- or two-person cell.

    Inmates are allowed outside their cells for an hour each day to shower, watch television in the day room, participate in outdoor recreation or talk on the telephone, Scott said. There are a bank of phones that use prepaid phone cards cellular telephones and Blackberries aren't allowed.

    There have been other celebrities at the women's jail. Actress
    Daryl Hannah, arrested last year for failing to leave a 14-acre inner-city garden where farmers were being evicted, spent a few hours there.

    A year ago, former "Lost" actress Michelle Rodriguez showed up to serve a 60-day jail sentence for violating probation terms after her drunken driving arrest in Hawaii. She was released in hours because of overcrowding.

    Sometimes stars are allowed to do their time in a jail of their choosing. In such cases celebrities pay a daily room-and-board fee to the smaller jails, which afford them more privacy and comfort.

    Sean Penn found a jail in Bridgeport, a remote town on the eastern flank of the Sierra, to serve a 60-day sentence in 1987 for fighting with a photographer in violation of his probation for a barroom brawl.

    Cop-slapping actress Zsa Zsa Gabor served three days behind bars in 1990 at the El Segundo jail near the Los Angeles International Airport. She paid $85 a day.

    But the judge in Hilton's case wouldn't allow such an arrangement, so she'll head to Lynwood on June 5.
    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Paris' Mom to Prosecutor: "This is PATHETIC!"

    Moments after Paris Hilton was sentenced to serve 45 in the clink, TMZ learned that her mother, Kathy, rushed over to the lead prosecutor and lashed out, "I want your autograph. This is pathetic."

    In the same breath, as she walked out of the courtroom, Kathy looked up and said, "I can't believe all the money we spent on this."

    http://www.tmz.com/2007/05/04/paris...is-is-pathetic/
    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    (from gofugyourself)
    Karma is a *****. So is Paris Hilton. So it only makes sense that the two would crash together, with unspeakably awesome results. There is NOTHING more fantastic than Kathy Hilton ranting about how much they spent, NOTHING as satisfying the long arm of the law finally reaching out and choking somebody with no redeeming qualities, and NOTHING as awesome as imagining Paris having to sleep on an uncomfortable cot underneath a burly, hygienically challenged, tattooed, pierced, and lightly mustachioed cell mate named Bertha. Today, even if it feels kind of bad for flashing its *****pants, the world is full of glee. VICTORY IN OUR TIME.

    Poor P. Pooooooooooooor little P. Prison clothes don't come in leopard, sweet pea. And you probably won't get to use all that makeup, either, but it's just as well, because it makes you look like a wax figurine. As for Josh, don't worry -- he disappeared before your hearing, although I'm sure that was PURE coincidence. But just as a tip for the future, girlie, sometimes guys get sick of dating girls who just can't seem to remember to stop drinking and driving.

    Also, seriously, DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE. For real. And don't then keep driving without a license. How hard is that to remember? Maybe you can sweet-talk Bertha into tattooing it to your arm.

    At any rate, refill all your prescriptions, Men of Hollywood, and leave no ointment or salve behind. Paris has a month left before 45 days in the clink, and you know she will spend it throwing as many bratwursts onto the grill as she possibly can.

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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Betterread View Post
    (from gofugyourself)
    Karma is a *****. So is Paris Hilton. So it only makes sense that the two would crash together, with unspeakably awesome results. There is NOTHING more fantastic than Kathy Hilton ranting about how much they spent, NOTHING as satisfying the long arm of the law finally reaching out and choking somebody with no redeeming qualities, and NOTHING as awesome as imagining Paris having to sleep on an uncomfortable cot underneath a burly, hygienically challenged, tattooed, pierced, and lightly mustachioed cell mate named Bertha. Today, even if it feels kind of bad for flashing its *****pants, the world is full of glee. VICTORY IN OUR TIME.

    Poor P. Pooooooooooooor little P. Prison clothes don't come in leopard, sweet pea. And you probably won't get to use all that makeup, either, but it's just as well, because it makes you look like a wax figurine. As for Josh, don't worry -- he disappeared before your hearing, although I'm sure that was PURE coincidence. But just as a tip for the future, girlie, sometimes guys get sick of dating girls who just can't seem to remember to stop drinking and driving.

    Also, seriously, DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE. For real. And don't then keep driving without a license. How hard is that to remember? Maybe you can sweet-talk Bertha into tattooing it to your arm.

    At any rate, refill all your prescriptions, Men of Hollywood, and leave no ointment or salve behind. Paris has a month left before 45 days in the clink, and you know she will spend it throwing as many bratwursts onto the grill as she possibly can.
    OUCH!

    Where'd you find that?
    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Quote Originally Posted by WilyMoROCKS View Post
    OUCH!

    Where'd you find that?

    one of my wife's favorite sites -
    http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/

  13. #12
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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    nm
    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


  14. #13
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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Scrap Irony View Post
    Calipari is not, nor has he ever been accused or "caught", cheating. He himself turned in one of his players (Camby) for dealing with an agent to get one Final Four overturned. The other is all on the NCAA and Rose. (IF Rose cheated.)
    "Cheering for Kentucky is like watching Star Wars and hoping Darth Vader chokes an ewok"


  15. #14
    First Time Caller SunDeck's Avatar
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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    I smell a new reality show.

    "Hilton, C Block".
    Next Reds manager, second shooter. --Confirmed on Redszone.

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    Re: Shawshank Part 2: The Paris Hilton Story

    Has anyone on here ever spent time in jail?

    I'm guilty, bar fight when I was in my early 20's put me in Queengate for 2 weeks (bad lawyer). Good times....Good times.
    Don't smoke'em if you got'em


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