mmmmm... gummy baseball
I'm just like everybody else. I have two arms, two legs and 4,000 hits."
"Starting Pitcher: Vida Blue
Hell of an arm, and his last name reminds me of the color of my pants."
The widow is gathering nettles for her children's dinner; a perfumed seigneur, delicately lounging in the Oeil de Boeuf, hath an alchemy whereby he will extract the third nettle and call it rent. ~ Carlyle
worst thing I've ever read on teh internets
When all is said and done more is said than done.
Designated Hitter: That guy from "The Natural"
Most Vottomatic Player
The writer of that atrocity should be punched in the eyeball one time, told he was an idiot, given 3 minutes to relax and think that was the extent of his punishment, and then as soon as he thought he was safe, he'd be catapulted directly into the sun. It was that dumb. Indefensibly dumb.
And plus, everybody knows that Homer Simpson's team would clearly consist of: Roger Clemens, Mike Scioscia, Don Mattingly, Steve Sax, Wade Boggs, Ozzie Smith, Jose Canseco, Ken Griffey Jr., but NOT Darryl Strawberry.
Rob Neyer: "Any writer who says he'd be a better manager than the worst manager is either 1) lying (i.e. 'using poetic license') or 2) patently delusional. Which isn't to say managers don't do stupid things that you or I wouldn't."
It would be but Homer never got a chance to play with any of them except for Strawberry because Clemens went under hypnosis and believed he was a chicken, Scioscia was in the hospital for radiation poisoning, Mattingly was fired because he wouldn't cut his sideburns short enough to please Mr. Burns, Sax was arrested for murder, Boggs was knocked out by Barney, Ozzie fell into a vortex, Canseco was waylaid on his way to the game helping a woman save all her belongings from a fire and Jr. took too much brain and nerve tonic and had Gigantism.
The Rally Onion wants 150 fans before Opening Day.