I'd just like to say I genuinely appreciate each and everyone who took the time to read and reply to my topic. It means a lot to me.
Now to shed a little more light on my situation:
As far as sending a friend to do my work, I definatly learned a lesson about that. It just kills me knowing that it was all coincidence. Jeff convinced me to send him because he was afraid I didn't have the balls to do it that day like I wanted to, and of course Alyssa just happened to be smitten with him and decided to use the oppurtunity to tell him. But whatever, no more of that ever again.
In regards to what Steel was saying about love it or leave it, I've tried twice before to tell her my feelings with two different results. The first time was right after Jeff went to her and she told me "I'm sorry, I don't know. I'm not ready". So I took that as I have a chance and still just wanted to be good friends. Then when all of this came out last month I got the dreaded "You're an awesome guy, I really like you...as a friend". And I tried to cut ties with her at the end of the conversation, saying maybe we could talk but not particularly soon. And I made a joke that she took as me saying I wouldn't talk to her for four years and she started to cry. So I got suckered back in...
In regards to my intentions of speaking with Alyssa, that's what I myself am trying to figure out. Like bucksfan said, I'm not really sure that I can ever fully trust her again, so I really don't know what it is I want. Part of me probably still wants to convince her I'm boyfriend material, but I would be the first to admit that by doing that I'm just opening myself up for more pain when things stay the same. What still shocks me about all of this is that she is probably the nicest girl you'd ever meet, everyone who knows her loves her. But she said herself that she was selfish and I guess I learned a lesson about people.
It's not especially important, but what makes Jeff all the more disliked by me is that all along the plan was for him to live in an apartment with his girlfriend in Florida. And he is. And even when they were living together at the beginning of this summer he continued to tell Alyssa (who thought it would end when he moved) how much he loved and missed her. So he really screwed up his poor girlfriend's life as well. But she has apparently decided to stay with him, to which I say good luck with that. And I forget to mention the Redszone connection. Jeff's girlfriend is Dave Miley's neice. And when Dave's son died and his girlfriend went to her cousin's funeral, Jeff used the oppurtunity to speak to Alyssa who was shocked he could be so callous. Classy guy, my best friend is.
I very much take it to heart what bucksfan, redsmetz, paintmered, and Mario have said to me. It makes me feel better knowing others have gone through similar situations and can now speak of it as it is, the past.
I should note I wasn't trying to get on my high horse or anything about the college stereotypes. All of those things are fine in moderation, it's just that in my personal experience with people around them they lead to trouble.
And to everyone who had suggestions relating to college, I plan on listening. I really do want to put myself out there and will definatly be looking at more orginizations. I knew I would have to let go of high school but I never expected things to take such a sharp turn. But I can't let that detour me. I plan on making the best of what I have and finding what makes me happy.