BCS Declares Germany Winner of WWII

[Razor Shines]

I don't know who wrote this originally it came to me from my brother in-law who is a huge Texas fan. I google'd it. It's going around on a lot of message boards, but no one seems to know who the author is. If anyone finds the original please link it, they deserve credit.

US Ranked 4th

After determining the Big-12 championship game participants, the BCS computers were put to work on other major contests and today the BCS declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.

"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into conference play with defeats of Poland, France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Belgium and the Netherlands. Their only losses came against the US and Russia; however considering their entire body of work--including an incredibly tough Strength of Schedule--our computers deemed them worthy of the #1 ranking."

Questioned about the #4 ranking of the United States the BCS commissioner stated "The US only had two major victories--Japan and Germany. The computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by head-to-head contests--they consider each contest to be only a single, equally-weighted event."

German Chancellor Adolf Hitler said "Yes, we lost to the US; but we defeated #2 ranked France in only 6 weeks." Herr Hitler has been criticized for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to enhance Germany's rankings. Hitler protested "Our contest with Poland was in doubt until the final day and the conditions in Norway were incredibly challenging and demanded the application of additional forces."

The French ranking has also come under scrutiny. The BCS commented " France had a single loss against Germany and following a preseason #1 ranking they only fell to #2."

Japan was ranked #3 with victories including Manchuria, Borneo and the Philippines.

[guttle11]

Germany's SOS was atrocious.

[remdog]

Ummmm, interesting.

Did they take into consideration that the US was actually playing in one of those 'lessor' conferences (you know, MAC, WAC, GAC [opps, sorry that's the G-man ]?

Anyway, there we were (the US) just bligthly going about our game and all of a sudden we're scheduled against Japan and Germany! Come on! I thought we had Panama and Lichtenstein on the schedule! Darn, without airmail it's tough to keep up the frentic pace of the '40's!

Anyway, since the BCS has finally gone to a playoff system, and we kicked butt head-to-head, I think we'll be number one in '46.

Rem

[*BaseClogger*]

The U.S. was an up-and-comer and therefore was lowly ranked in the preseason poll...

[GAC]

That's because our head coach (Ike) made some really terrible game time decisions early in the game.

He should have listened to his offensive coordinator (Patton).

[MrCinatit]

A couple of the German linemen did become quality players for the Soviet and U.S.

[Chip R]

I saw that on the College Football newsgroup. I thought about posting it myself.

[Caveat Emperor]

I thought Germany lost to England too. That's a road loss to a much smaller opponent, which I think should've bumped them further back in the polls than it did.

[Chip R]

I thought Germany lost to England too. That's a road loss to a much smaller opponent, which I think should've bumped them further back in the polls than it did.

Germany had problems with Finland which was a 1-AA team. They won but Finland gave them a game.

[Marc D]

I'm sorry but if it happened before 1950 doesn't that automatically make Notre Dame or Michigan the winner?

[RedsBaron]

Germany had problems with Finland which was a 1-AA team. They won but Finland gave them a game.

I don't recall Germany playing Finland. Russia did have the embarassment of being tied by Finland early in the season, but the game was on the Finns' home turf and the Russian team was then somewhat in disarray, with Russian head coach Stalin constantly dismissing assistant coaches and players, most of whom were never heard of again. Even with Russia's great play at the end of the season, few Russian coaches and players feel secure in their positions.
Japan's number three ranking was hotly disputed by some critics, who noted that Japan had been unable to sustain a great early run of victories. Japan did surprise America early in the season in an on-the-road win at Pearl Harbor, but Japan had the advantage of having already scored several easy wins over such lesser foes as Manchuria and China, whereas the game at Pearl Harbor was America's opening game; most people agree that the Americans simply were not ready and were surprised by Japan's spread offense.
However, after several coaching changes and roster moves, America came on strong in the second half and, in an unusual re-match with Japan to close out the season the Americans unleased a second half aerial assault masterminded by Curtis LeMay to devastate Japan. Some observers criticized LeMay for allegedly running up the score in the fourth quarter (one critic compared it to dropping a second atomic bomb), but LeMay said that if Japan couldn't take it then the Japanese should never have put America on their schedule. American assistant head coach MacArthur (one of several assistants who allegedly have been trying to gain the top coaching spot) insists America could defeat anyone.
Italy began the season highly ranked and an easy win over out matched Ethiopa seemed to justify the ranking, but the Italian team then largely collapsed, dismissed its head coach, and then tried to switch conferences.
Switzerland (0-0) finished the season in the top ten even though the Swiss played no one. Germany's Hitler explained his decision not to play the Swiss by noting that the Swiss insist that any game be played at home and that there would be nothing to gain for a large school such as Germany playing a small independent such as Switzerland.

[Chip R]

I don't recall Germany playing Finland.

My bad. I meant Norway.

[remdog]

I don't recall Germany playing Finland. Russia did have the embarassment of being tied by Finland early in the season, but the game was on the Finns' home turf and the Russian team was then somewhat in disarray, with Russian head coach Stalin constantly dismissing assistant coaches and players, most of whom were never heard of again. Even with Russia's great play at the end of the season, few Russian coaches and players feel secure in their positions.
Japan's number three ranking was hotly disputed by some critics, who noted that Japan had been unable to sustain a great early run of victories. Japan did surprise America early in the season in an on-the-road win at Pearl Harbor, but Japan had the advantage of having already scored several easy wins over such lesser foes as Manchuria and China, whereas the game at Pearl Harbor was America's opening game; most people agree that the Americans simply were not ready and were surprised by Japan's spread offense.
However, after several coaching changes and roster moves, America came on strong in the second half and, in an unusual re-match with Japan to close out the season the Americans unleased a second half aerial assault masterminded by Curtis LeMay to devastate Japan. Some observers criticized LeMay for allegedly running up the score in the fourth quarter (one critic compared it to dropping a second atomic bomb), but LeMay said that if Japan couldn't take it then the Japanese should never have put America on their schedule. American assistant head coach MacArthur (one of several assistants who allegedly have been trying to gain the top coaching spot) insists America could defeat anyone.
Italy began the season highly ranked and an easy win over out matched Ethiopa seemed to justify the ranking, but the Italian team then largely collapsed, dismissed its head coach, and then tried to switch conferences.
Switzerland (0-0) finished the season in the top ten even though the Swiss played no one. Germany's Hitler explained his decision not to play the Swiss by noting that the Swiss insist that any game be played at home and that there would be nothing to gain for a large school such as Germany playing a small independent such as Switzerland.

Very, very good, RB.

Rem

[cumberlandreds]

I thought Germany lost to England too. That's a road loss to a much smaller opponent, which I think should've bumped them further back in the polls than it did.

Hitler needs to explain himself for dropping the running game against England and strictly used an aerial assault. He had to know he needed to soften them up with a ground attack.

[paintmered]

Hitler needs to explain himself for dropping the running game against England and strictly used an aerial assault. He had to know he needed to soften them up with a ground attack.

The downfall of the run-and-shoot was the inability to kill the clock when leading. It reared its ugly head again.