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Thread: Funny Baseball Quotes

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    Goober GAC's Avatar
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    Funny Baseball Quotes

    Of course we're all full aware of Yogi Berra's "Yogisms"....

    "Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours."

    "He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious."

    "It's like deja-vu, all over again"

    "You can observe a lot just by watching."

    But how about some other great quotes? And it doesn't necessarily have to be by an athlete or manager.

    If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base. - Dave Barry

    We're supposed to be perfect our first day on the job and then show constant improvement. - Ed Vargo, major league baseball umpire

    Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalised for too many players on the field - Jim Bouton

    Trying to sneak a fastball past Hank Aaron is like trying to sneak the sunrise past a rooster. - Joe Adcock

    When we played softball, I'd steal 2nd base, feel guilty and go back. - Woody Allen

    I'm beginning to see Brooks [Robinson] in my sleep. If I dropped a paper plate, he'd pick it up on one hop and throw me out at first. - Sparky Anderson

    And I never heard of this guy named Rocky Bridges until recently. Of course, unless you're a baseball historian, or really, really an old-timer, one probably wouldn't. He wasn't a stand-out player; but did play for the Reds for 4 years in the mid-50s.

    "It's a good thing I stayed in Cincinnati for four years It took me that long to learn how to spell it."

    "Coaching third with a pitcher on base is like being a member of a bomb disposal squad. The thing could blow up in your face at any moment."

    "You know when you've got it made? When you get your name in the crossword puzzles."
    "In my day you had musicians who experimented with drugs. Now it's druggies experimenting with music" - Alfred G Clark (circa 1972)


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  3. #2
    You're being very UnDude. sonny's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    "Our next homestand is after this roadtrip" - Mickey Rivers
    Witty signature.

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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    "If people don't want to come out to the ball park, nobody's gonna stop 'em." — Yogi Berra
    “I think I throw the ball as hard as anyone. The ball just doesn't get there as fast.” — Eddie Bane

    “We know we're better than this ... but we can't prove it.” — Tony Gwynn

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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Quote Originally Posted by GAC View Post
    Of course we're all full aware of Yogi Berra's "Yogisms"....

    But how about some other great quotes? And it doesn't necessarily have to be by an athlete or manager.
    Anything by Rickey Henderson.

  6. #5
    So Long Uncle Joe BoydsOfSummer's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    "Take those guys over to the other fields. I wanna see if they can play on the road."--Sparky Anderson
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    "Sit over here next to Johnathan (Bench)...sit right here, he's smart."--Sparky Anderson

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    First Time Caller SunDeck's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    This one's pretty funny:
    "We've just come to a point where we're not going to lose anymore."
    - Bob Castellini
    Next Reds manager, second shooter. --Confirmed on Redszone.

  8. #7
    Socratic Gadfly TheNext44's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Don't have the exact quote, but Lenny Randle once said the reason why he had didn't have as many homers in the second half of the season as the first half, was because the first half was longer.
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." -- Albert Einstein

  9. #8
    So Long Uncle Joe BoydsOfSummer's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Who is keeping the Dustinator Funny Quote Journal? Man, those are a real hoot!
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    "Sit over here next to Johnathan (Bench)...sit right here, he's smart."--Sparky Anderson

  10. #9
    Socratic Gadfly TheNext44's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Quote Originally Posted by BoydsOfSummer View Post
    Who is keeping the Dustinator Funny Quote Journal? Man, those are a real hoot!
    I'm not sure the site could handle the bandwidth.
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." -- Albert Einstein

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    6 months of heartbreak Bob Borkowski's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women - and the other ten percent I wasted." -- Tug McGraw

  12. #11
    6 months of heartbreak Bob Borkowski's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    (Concerning Bobby Richardson) "He don't smoke, he don't drink, and he still can't hit .250." -- Casey Stengel

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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Joe Garagiola commenting on the deal which sent he, Dick Cole, Bill Howerton, Howie Pollet and Ted Wilks to the Pirates for Cliff Chambers and Wally Westlake said "this was one of those trades that hurts both teams".

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    6 months of heartbreak Bob Borkowski's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    When Lou Piniella used to play the outfield for the Royals and Yankees, he'd yell at hecklers in the stands, "Go home and check your wife, we've got a ballplayer missing." -- Tim McCarver

  16. #14
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Ichiro commenting on his feelings for Cleveland, “To tell the truth, I’m not excited to go to Cleveland, but we have to. If I ever saw myself saying I’m excited going to Cleveland, I’d punch myself in the face, because I’m lying.”
    "This isn’t stats vs scouts - this is stats and scouts working together, building an organization that blends the best of both worlds. This is the blueprint for how a baseball organization should be run. And, whether the baseball men of the 20th century like it or not, this is where baseball is going."---Dave Cameron, U.S.S. Mariner

  17. #15
    Socratic Gadfly TheNext44's Avatar
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    Re: Funny Baseball Quotes

    Some Classic Harry Carey quotes:

    "I think the key to the Cubs offense is them scoring more runs."

    "Everyone wonders what's wrong with Shawn Boskie. Some say he doesn't warm up enough, some says he warms up too much. Some say he throws too many fastballs, some say he doesn't throw enough. Maybe the problem with Shawn Boskie is that every time he throws a strike, the batter hits it real hard."

    "The Cubs traded Ray Fontenot and George Frazier to the Twins for Ron Davis. Looks like the Cubs got the better end of this deal. They got rid of two terrible pitchers and only got one terrible pitcher back."
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." -- Albert Einstein


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