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Thread: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers (April Fools)

  1. #1
    Socratic Gadfly TheNext44's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Los Angeles

    Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers (April Fools)

    CINCINNATI, Ohio - Today, in a surprise move, the Reds named Kip (don't call me Kipster) Wells as their number five starter in their rotation. He will pitch on Sunday, April 11th against the Cubs.
    "We felt that Wood was too lefthanded and Leake threw too many strikes," manager Dusty Baker said, "That's the advantage Wells gives you, he's always behind in the count, which leads to more walks, which just clogs up the bases for the other team."
    In an even more surprising move, in order to make room for Wells, the Reds moved Aroldis Chapman off of the 40 man roster and hopes that he will clear waivers. Any team can now claim Chapman for the $25,000 waiver fee.
    "He's new, from a foreign country, and doesn't speak much English, so we figure that no one has heard of him and he'll slip by easily," Reds General Manager Walt Jocketty said of the move. "If not, we know Jimmy Anderson is trying a comeback and he can fill his spot as a lefty starter in the organization."
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." -- Albert Einstein

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  3. #2
    Ok maybe I am dead Homer's Ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003

    Re: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers

    This one didn't get me.

  4. #3
    Baseball card addict MrCinatit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005

    Re: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers

    Nice one.

  5. #4
    Member blumj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Northern MA

    Re: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers

    Sorry, went too far with Chapman on waivers.
    "Reality tells us there are no guarantees. Except that some day Jon Lester will be on that list of 100-game winners." - Peter Gammons

  6. #5
    Someday Never Comes mth123's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006

    Re: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers

    So what about Chapman? He's no Sidd Finch.
    "All I can tell them is pick a good one and sock it." --BABE RUTH

    Having better players makes "the right time" or "the big hit" happen a lot more often. PLUS PLUS

  7. #6
    Blowing away bad memories Redsfan320's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Oxford, OH

    Re: Kip Wells Named 5th Starter: Chapman on Waivers

    I was scared for a second...


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