For those of us that have ever done something so dumb that it's comical, this is the thread for you. I'll begin with a story of my own, that I did just yesterday, and by my estimations will be pretty tough to beat. Sorry it's so long, hopefully it'll be worth it...
I pulled into the local gas station just off the highway after work. I put the gas pump into the tank, set the automatic pump thingy, and walked inside the station to get a drink and a snack. The lady in front of me in line needed to buy about 47 scratch-offs and 96 lottery tickets, so by the time they got to ringing me up my patience was running thin. I wasn't really in a rush to get anywhere, but just wanted to get home after a long day of school and classes. I paid for my Combos and Mountain Dew as fast as I could, and was out the door.
I walked back over to my car and got in. I started her up, put it in Drive and pulled away. I heard a low, grumbling crunch as I took off, but it abruptly stopped after I straightened up the wheels, so I figured it was nothing and went on my way back to my place, which is only a half mile or so away. As I was driving down the street, I passed by a driver who was waiting to turn onto the road, and I looked at him. His mouth was wide open, and he was shaking his head as I passed. I said to myself, "What the hell's this guy's problem," and as I said that, I saw something in the side view mirror.
"Oh CRAP!" I yelled out. There I was, driving down the road with four feet of a freaking severed gas pump hanging out of my gas tank. I pulled off as soon as I could, hoping nobody else noticed, but of course they had on this busy afternoon. One guy pulled in behind me to let me know about the freaking severed gas pump I was hauling around. I told him I now saw it and thanked him for stopping, but I could tell from the look on his face he couldn't wait to get to work the next day to tell everyone about the dumbass that drove off with a gas pump in his tank, lol.
Well, I had to go back to the gas station then, tail between my legs, not knowing what to expect. Is there going to be gas leaking all over?, How much is this going to cost to fix? I kept wondering to myself. I pulled back into the now dysfunctional pump station and noticed no gas leaking, which was a relief. One of the attendants came out and I told her what had happened. She didn't laugh or even offer a hint of a smirk and said to just leave the hose next to the pump, and she'd take care of it later. Apparently, this had happened before, and the pump hose is designed to break away for just such an occasion.
So, all in all, I didn't do any damage (besides to my pride), and it didnt cost me anything (besides some ego points), and I get a knee slapper of a story out of it. Anybody else (almost) as dumb as me??