As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.
Meter spots are available FOR FREE at 6pm every night downtown. So time your arrival just before then and you can get a great, close spot for free.
EDIT: I should say, technically, you don't have to pay meters after 5pm usually, but most streets downtown have no parking 4-6pm. Hence, the 6pm timing for those spots.
I have a love-hate relationship with Albert Pujols. Mostly hate.