Residency & Shared Custody - Legal Question

[savafan]

My girlfriend, the mother of my son, has a daughter with another man. She was going to give up full custody of her daughter, but I convinced her that was a bad idea, and that she ought to go for shared custody. She agreed and her court date was in Hamilton County this past Tuesday.

We live in Franklin County, while the father of her daughter lives in Hamilton County. We have a lease for an apartment here that runs through February. The judge in the shared custody hearing said that in order for her to have shared custody, she would have to move back to Hamilton County, or at least within 80 miles. They basically gave her until the end of this month.

We can't afford to break our lease, so her idea is to go and get an apartment in Cincinnati while still helping me pay for this apartment in Columbus, until the lease runs out, although I don't think she'll be able to afford that. The part that really sucks for me is not having my son around for the next 8 months, especially since we were just building our relationship, and the kid adores me.

Does anyone know if there are any other avenues available to us at all? I'd rather not break up my family if there's a chance that I don't have to, as well as being stuck in this city all alone, which sucks, I know.

Any helpful advice will be greatly appreciated.

[TRF]

How long is your lease?

[KoryMac5]

I wonder if the biological father could waive the need for the mother to be in Hamilton County, at least until your lease is up.

[Sea Ray]

Is he a good father? If he is let him have full custody and you folks can get quality time every other weekend or whatever. Are you sure you need more commitments? You've got your own kid to raise. I don't know if all this hassle is worth it including the strained relationship with the father. If you "keep it cool" with him he'd tend to be more loose about letting you have the daughter when you want. For the record I'm not a big fan of shared custody in general.

[savafan]

How long is your lease?

Until February.

[savafan]

Is he a good father? If he is let him have full custody and you folks can get quality time every other weekend or whatever. Are you sure you need more commitments? You've got your own kid to raise. I don't know if all this hassle is worth it including the strained relationship with the father. If you "keep it cool" with him he'd tend to be more loose about letting you have the daughter when you want. For the record I'm not a big fan of shared custody in general.

He does seem to be a good father.

Curious, why aren't you a fan of shared custody?

[Fon Duc Tow]

Shared custody is not a good thing. Kind of like walking down the middle of the road.

Mr. Miyagi: Man walk on left side of road, ok. Man walk on right side of road, ok. Man walk down middle of road? Squish... like grape.

You take full custody, ok. They take full custody, ok. Split custody? Squish, like grape.

[edabbs44]

How long is your lease?

In NJ, it is kind of an open secret that leases have zero legal backing.

[savafan]

In NJ, it is kind of an open secret that leases have zero legal backing.

Is it the same in Ohio?

[savafan]

What are the benefits toward giving the father full custody vs. the hardship of going the shared custody route?

[JaxRed]

On various levels I agree with not going for the shared custody. You have a child and a shared home in Franklin county. Make that work as your primary goal. Hamilton County isn't that far away, she can be a non-custodial parent and still be in frequent contact.

[Sea Ray]

Curious, why aren't you a fan of shared custody?

It's too confusing for the kid. She needs to have one home and consistency in her life. It's tough to maintain contacts with her friends; it'll take a lot of your time and energy to take her to school and other commitments and the parenting itself will be inconsistent.

If you care to read more here you go:

http://parenting.families.com/blog/t...ysical-custody

[RBA]

I'm guessing you can't sublease the apartment/house out? How about an early termination fee of the lease?

[reds1869]

Is it the same in Ohio?

As a landlord in Columbus, I won an $8,000 judgement against a tenant who had not paid rent for months and egregiously violated the terms of their lease. A slightly different situation, but proof that Franklin County will uphold a lease. From multiple trips to court there, I can assure you that the judges rarely side with the tenant. A lease will be upheld in court in Ohio; it is a matter of how aggressive the landlord wants to be, and how you handle the situation. I would try to approach the landlord about early termination--most will work with you, but some won't.

Perhaps not what you want to hear, but I don't want to see you in a bad situation. Best of luck to you.

[savafan]

I can't sway her on the shared custody idea. She says she doesn't want to be helpless when it comes to medical decisions for her daughter.