Popping the BIG question

[RFS62]

Make sure you get really drunk.

[jmcclain19]

Thanks everyone for your comments - they are truly appreciated.

I'll be updating in a few weeks what happens - although I'm not worried about it, I'll still be a tad nervous until then.

[LincolnparkRed]

A little advice for anyone planning to do it in London. Don't try in front of Buckingham palace. There is a big fountain outside and it was really dirty so I wound up proposing in the park across the street. I was supposed to do it earlier in the trip but one of the couples we were meeting for another person's wedding actually got engaged the day before we met up with them. So I had to wait until we were alone again. It will be two years soon and I am still trying to convince her that she likes the Reds.

[TeamCasey]

Congrats, Josh!

[919191]

I always thought it would be cool to propose while out flying a kite. I think that is a really serene, relaxed, and just nice place to be. Then when she hears the question while flying the kite, you can tell her not to crash the kite!

[savafan]

The first time I got engaged...honestly now, I can't even remember the proposal. It was a short marriage and such a nasty break-up that I've almost completely blocked everything out of my mind, including what she looked like.

The second time I got engaged, I didn't even know it. Believe it or not, it was on IM. We were talking one night on instant messenger and I asked her that very question someone else posted earlier, "Do you see this working out?" She simply typed "Yes" and logged off. I was confused until I started getting phone calls and e-mails from friends congratulating me on the engagement. I'm not sure if I did the honorable thing or the stupid thing by playing along and buying her a ring, but thankfully, after she tried to kill me, we never made it to the altar.

Now, the third time I got engaged was just a few months ago. 7 months to the day, actually that I am typing this. It was a cool January night, and we had spent the entire Saturday with a couple of friends. After our friends left my apartment, I asked her to go for a walk. This wasn't strange, we went for walks a lot. We walked down the street to Miamisburg's Library Park and I took her into the gazebo and had her sit down. Once she was seated, I got down on one knee and pulled out the ring. She laughed at me and asked me if the ring was real. When I assured her that it was, she said yes.

I don't want to wish you good luck, because I don't think you'll need it. Instead, I'll wish for you happiness. The asking is the easy part. It is everything that leads up to it that is hard.

[BuckU]

Here's my quick (& embarrassing) proposal story. I surprised my wife one night when she got home from work. I had candles, roses, & rose petals everywhere. When she walked in she saw it all, I proposed, yadda yadda yadda. After I got my "yes" I felt like a huge weight was off y shoulders. As I was getting up from being on my knee I bumped our coffee table which has a glass top. On that coffee table was a tall vase which had some roses in it. As i bumped the table I knocked over the vase and it fell over and shattered the glass top coffee table.

So one minute I’m on my knees proposing, the next minute I'm on my knees picking up glass fragments.

Another thing...guys, did any others ask the Father for permission? Am I the only one who felt that was more nerve racking than the proposal to the girlfriend?

[savafan]

Originally Posted by BuckU

Another thing...guys, did any others ask the Father for permission? Am I the only one who felt that was more nerve racking than the proposal to the girlfriend?

Didn't have the cajones to do that.

[gonelong]

Originally Posted by BuckU

Another thing...guys, did any others ask the Father for permission? Am I the only one who felt that was more nerve racking than the proposal to the girlfriend?

I had known my wife for about 10 years before we married. We had dated for 2 years in High school -4 year break for college- and then dated again for 4 years.

Her Dad asked me when we were going to get married, he wanted to retire.

When we were both poor, I'd stop and buy my wife peanut M&Ms all the time, its the only thing I could afford that she liked. I put her ring in a bag of them and she found it inside. Sounds much cheesier now than it did at the time.

GL

[GIK]

Originally Posted by BuckU

Another thing...guys, did any others ask the Father for permission? Am I the only one who felt that was more nerve racking than the proposal to the girlfriend?

That very occasion is coming up for me soon. I have about a month to build up the nerves, though, as he's out of the country.

[Red Leader]

I asked my father-in-law for his permission. Most nerve wracking experience ever as I had only known him for about 2-3 months. Knowing him like I do now, I shouldn't have been too worried about it. He was thrilled that I had the respect to ask him though, and it still works in my favor to this day.

[rdiersin]

Originally Posted by BuckU

Another thing...guys, did any others ask the Father for permission? Am I the only one who felt that was more nerve racking than the proposal to the girlfriend?

I did that. It was over the phone, since he lives a little bit aways from where I live. It was ackward to say the least. First of all, I had known my fiance for 4 years before I proposed, and he liked me, so I wasn't too worried or anything. Also, he doesn't really like to talk on the phone, so that didn't help either. So I asked him if I could marry his daughter and he said yeah, that would be fine. But that was pretty much how he said it, not much more. I think it would have been different if I were there talking to him face to face, because he is nice person, but it was just ackward talking on the phone.

[IowaRed]

I too asked my father-in-law for permission to marry his daughter....in our church parking lot. If I had the opportunity to do it over again I would choose a different location but I would still ask for his permission. We had been dating for 10 years so I'm sure he was expecting us to get married at some point but I think he was pleased that I chose to get his blessing

[BuckU]

Originally Posted by Red Leader

I asked my father-in-law for his permission. Most nerve wracking experience ever as I had only known him for about 2-3 months. Knowing him like I do now, I shouldn't have been too worried about it. He was thrilled that I had the respect to ask him though, and it still works in my favor to this day.

Same with me. He still tells me how classy it was. Major kiss butt points but ...Oh well...

...he's old school

[Roy Tucker]

Originally Posted by rdiersin

So I asked him if I could marry his daughter and he said yeah, that would be fine. But that was pretty much how he said it, not much more. I think it would have been different if I were there talking to him face to face, because he is nice person, but it was just ackward talking on the phone.

Funny how life is.... I used to relate more to the guy asking the question and now I'm getting closer to relating to the dad.

My daughters are almost-15 and 12. The almost-15 yr. old has boys sniffing around. Some have built up enough courage to meet me, shake my hand, call me Mr. "Tucker", try some small talk, etc. etc. I have to give them points for initiative and respect, so I thinly tolerate them and yak it up a little. However, I was 15 once and I still remember what was on my mind.

I find myself quickly assuming the role of Rottweiler at the gates and have my radar up at full strength. God help any of those boys if they mistreat my daughter in any way because they *will* need it.

I hope that in the future as my daughters grow up, start dating, start bringing guys home, blah blah, that I have enough perspective and enough faith in the good character we have instilled in my kids that I trust their judgement and values. I think I will.

However, these first few steps down this mine-filled path have really opened my eyes to how fathers must have viewed me when I first started darkening their front doors (and back windows throwing pebbles). I continue to think that God is having an enormous laugh at me with my daughters. Paybacks are a bite.