Favorite Michigan Football joke - RedsZone.com - Cincinnati Reds Fans' Home for Baseball Discussion

Sean_CaseyRules · 11-18-2005, 02:16 PM

This one is good, but there are awesome ones out there.

Q: Why do University of Michigan fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

Feel free to add your own

pedro · 11-18-2005, 02:21 PM

John Cooper

:

pedro · 11-18-2005, 02:25 PM

Q: How do you get an Ohio State Alumnus off your front porch?

A: pay for your pizza.

Red Leader · 11-18-2005, 02:30 PM

In a freak accident involving the Buckeyes mascot, a video camera and a tube of KY Jelly, Jim Tressell died, and went to heaven. When he arrived, St. Peter was waiting for him. He began to show him around the neighborhood, and eventually reached his dwelling. It was a nice log cabin with an OSU flag out front. They continued walking and eventually reached a huge 3 story mansion with tons of U of M decor in the yard and on the house. Tressell gets angry, and looks over at St. Peter.

"Why does Lloyd Carr get a mansion, while I’m stuck in a log cabin? Sure it’s nice, but he gets this? The guy can’t even lead his team to a bowl game victory for Christ sake!" Tressell yells.

St. Peter replies, "Jim, that’s not Lloyd Carr’s house, that’s God’s."

Red Leader · 11-18-2005, 02:33 PM

Hang on to any of the new State of Ohio quarters. If you have them, they may be a collector’s item due it’s unique design. The U.S. Treasury Announced today that it is recalling all the Ohio quarters produced at OSU. Treasury Undersecretary Jack Shackleford said Monday..."This action is being taken after numerous reports that new Ohio quarters will not work in parking meters, toll booths, vending machines, pay phones or other coin-operated devices." Shackleford continued on .. "The problem lies in the design of the Ohio quarter, created by a top-notched Ohio State University graduate student. Apparently, the duct tape holding the two dimes and the nickel together keeps jamming the coin-operated devices.

Red Leader · 11-18-2005, 02:35 PM

Why do birds fly upside-down over Columbus?
Cause it ain’t worth a crap

Red Leader · 11-18-2005, 02:37 PM

A Buckeye and Spartan fan were walking in the forest one day. They saw a set of tracks and started arguing over what kind of tracks they were.

The Buckeye fan said, "I think they’re deer tracks!"

The Spartan fan said, "I think they’re dog tracks!"

They were still arguing when the train hit them

Red Leader · 11-18-2005, 02:38 PM

Q: How many pallbearers would be needed for a OSU alumni funeral?

A: Two. A garbage can only has two handles.

OldRightHander · 11-18-2005, 02:59 PM

The UM library burned down the other day. All 13 books were destroyed and 10 of them hadn't even been colored in yet.

redsfan30 · 11-18-2005, 03:29 PM

What are the best 3 years of a Michigan football player's life?

His freshman year.

Sean_CaseyRules · 11-18-2005, 03:30 PM

Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them

pedro · 11-18-2005, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sean_CaseyRules

Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them

exactly. or Georgia/ Georgia tech etc etc.

I may use a few of them on the Oregon fans out here just to rib them.

OldRightHander · 11-18-2005, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sean_CaseyRules

Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them

I say let both sides fire away. All in good fun.

Sean_CaseyRules · 11-18-2005, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OldRightHander

I say let both sides fire away. All in good fun.

I should've been thinking that way in the first place.

RedFanAlways1966 · 11-18-2005, 03:40 PM

OSU potty training....

11-18-2005, 02:16 PM	#1
Sean_CaseyRules Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Back in the Burg, Ohio. Posts: 1,330	Favorite Michigan Football joke This one is good, but there are awesome ones out there. Q: Why do University of Michigan fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards? A: So they can park in handicap spaces. Feel free to add your own __________________ Let's make some noise! Last edited by Sean_CaseyRules; 11-18-2005 at 02:20 PM.

11-18-2005, 02:21 PM	#2
pedro Please come again Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: portland, oregon Posts: 14,716	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke John Cooper : __________________ Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

11-18-2005, 02:25 PM	#3
pedro Please come again Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: portland, oregon Posts: 14,716	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke Q: How do you get an Ohio State Alumnus off your front porch? A: pay for your pizza. __________________ Get your nunchucks and the keys to your dad's car. I know where we can get a gun

11-18-2005, 02:30 PM	#4
Red Leader Puffy's Daddy Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Centerville, OH Posts: 20,422	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke In a freak accident involving the Buckeyes mascot, a video camera and a tube of KY Jelly, Jim Tressell died, and went to heaven. When he arrived, St. Peter was waiting for him. He began to show him around the neighborhood, and eventually reached his dwelling. It was a nice log cabin with an OSU flag out front. They continued walking and eventually reached a huge 3 story mansion with tons of U of M decor in the yard and on the house. Tressell gets angry, and looks over at St. Peter. "Why does Lloyd Carr get a mansion, while I’m stuck in a log cabin? Sure it’s nice, but he gets this? The guy can’t even lead his team to a bowl game victory for Christ sake!" Tressell yells. St. Peter replies, "Jim, that’s not Lloyd Carr’s house, that’s God’s." __________________ 'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.' -Snoop on his retirement Your Mom is happy.

11-18-2005, 02:33 PM	#5
Red Leader Puffy's Daddy Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Centerville, OH Posts: 20,422	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke Hang on to any of the new State of Ohio quarters. If you have them, they may be a collector’s item due it’s unique design. The U.S. Treasury Announced today that it is recalling all the Ohio quarters produced at OSU. Treasury Undersecretary Jack Shackleford said Monday..."This action is being taken after numerous reports that new Ohio quarters will not work in parking meters, toll booths, vending machines, pay phones or other coin-operated devices." Shackleford continued on .. "The problem lies in the design of the Ohio quarter, created by a top-notched Ohio State University graduate student. Apparently, the duct tape holding the two dimes and the nickel together keeps jamming the coin-operated devices. __________________ 'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.' -Snoop on his retirement Your Mom is happy.

11-18-2005, 02:35 PM	#6
Red Leader Puffy's Daddy Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Centerville, OH Posts: 20,422	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke Why do birds fly upside-down over Columbus? Cause it ain’t worth a crap __________________ 'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.' -Snoop on his retirement Your Mom is happy.

11-18-2005, 02:37 PM	#7
Red Leader Puffy's Daddy Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Centerville, OH Posts: 20,422	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke A Buckeye and Spartan fan were walking in the forest one day. They saw a set of tracks and started arguing over what kind of tracks they were. The Buckeye fan said, "I think they’re deer tracks!" The Spartan fan said, "I think they’re dog tracks!" They were still arguing when the train hit them __________________ 'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.' -Snoop on his retirement Your Mom is happy.

11-18-2005, 02:38 PM	#8
Red Leader Puffy's Daddy Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Centerville, OH Posts: 20,422	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke Q: How many pallbearers would be needed for a OSU alumni funeral? A: Two. A garbage can only has two handles. __________________ 'When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg.' -Snoop on his retirement Your Mom is happy.

11-18-2005, 02:59 PM	#9
OldRightHander Resident optimist Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: east of WOY Posts: 5,028	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke The UM library burned down the other day. All 13 books were destroyed and 10 of them hadn't even been colored in yet.

11-18-2005, 03:29 PM	#10
redsfan30 Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,545	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke What are the best 3 years of a Michigan football player's life? His freshman year. __________________ "Strickland Propane... Taste the meat, not the heat." - Hank Hill

11-18-2005, 03:30 PM	#11
Sean_CaseyRules Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Back in the Burg, Ohio. Posts: 1,330	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke Well ummm....sorry that i wasn't specific but, this thread was ment to be for OSU fans, lol, but, they are still good jokes cause you can put michigan to replace OSU in any of them __________________ Let's make some noise!

11-18-2005, 03:40 PM	#15
RedFanAlways1966 For a Level Playing Field Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Oakwood, OH Posts: 11,240	Re: Favorite Michigan Football joke OSU potty training.... Attached Thumbnails __________________ Small market fan... always hoping, but never expecting.

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