Turn Off Ads?
Page 1 of 15 1234511 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 225

Thread: The Divorce Thread

  1. #1
    Daffy Duck RedTeamGo!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Cleveland, OH
    Posts
    13,562

    The Divorce Thread

    I know some on here have gone through divorce.

    I have recently been thinking about it. Not sure if you can refer to my marriage as a marriage anymore. Not going to go into specifics.

    I am mostly curious about the logistics of the whole thing. How does it work? Is it as terrible of a process as I am imagining? What is the first step? How much should I expect this to cost me?

    Thanks


  2. Turn Off Ads?
  3. #2
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Chapel Hill NC
    Posts
    3,739

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo! View Post
    I know some on here have gone through divorce.

    I have recently been thinking about it. Not sure if you can refer to my marriage as a marriage anymore. Not going to go into specifics.

    I am mostly curious about the logistics of the whole thing. How does it work? Is it as terrible of a process as I am imagining? What is the first step? How much should I expect this to cost me?
    Thanks
    Havnt gone through it personally, but from my friends that have gone through it I would have to say almost everything . Good luck.
    UNC Tar Heels 2017 National Champions 6 time NCAA Champs!!!
    57, 82, 93, 05, 09, 17
    Go Heels!!!!!

  4. #3
    Member Sea Ray's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Cincinnati, Ohio
    Posts
    20,875

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo! View Post
    I know some on here have gone through divorce.

    I have recently been thinking about it. Not sure if you can refer to my marriage as a marriage anymore. Not going to go into specifics.

    I am mostly curious about the logistics of the whole thing. How does it work? Is it as terrible of a process as I am imagining? What is the first step? How much should I expect this to cost me?

    Thanks
    So the baby didn't lead to happiness for your wife?

    I've been through it but no kids involved.

  5. #4
    Daffy Duck RedTeamGo!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Cleveland, OH
    Posts
    13,562

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Sea Ray View Post
    So the baby didn't lead to happiness for your wife?

    I've been through it but no kids involved.
    She is stressed about everything and redirects everything at me. I can do nothing right, basically. Just not a happy marriage whatsoever. I don't see it getting better.

  6. #5
    Member Sea Ray's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Cincinnati, Ohio
    Posts
    20,875

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo! View Post
    She is stressed about everything and redirects everything at me. I can do nothing right, basically. Just not a happy marriage whatsoever. I don't see it getting better.
    Yeah, not good.

  7. #6
    TyrannoSuarez Wrecks WrongVerb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2000
    Location
    Monterey, CA
    Posts
    15,525

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    When my marriage of 13 years was at its end in 2004 we got a lawyer who specialized in divorce mediation to draw up the proper documents. Cost about $1500. That was in Virginia. I'm assuming costs and laws will be different in Ohio but it's something to look into if the divorce is going to be amicable. Oh, and no kids were involved so that might be different for you as well.

    BTW, it's going to suck in a lot of ways for awhile when you are back on your own.
    Gratitude + Forgiveness = Happiness

    Covid to date...
    Total cases: 13,248,924
    New cases yesterday: 108,291
    Total deaths: 269,560
    New deaths yesterday: 1,311

  8. #7
    They call me "chef"
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    2,300

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    I've read that marriage satisfaction is at its lowest point around the time children are first introduced to the picture. It sounds like a hard period in general. I'm sorry to hear it's been worse due to the relationship being strained.

  9. #8
    Sprinkles are for winners dougdirt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    49,394

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Lawyer costs, at a minimum are probably going to run you $1500-2000. The retainer will probably be at least half of that.

    Beyond that, I can't help much - but I just know that much from some friends that have recently been divorced.

  10. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Cleveland, OH
    Posts
    2,691

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Sorry to hear it man, I'm going through it right now and honestly it is miserable.

    I don't have kids, so that has made it a lot easier. We are just using a mediator and that has really kept the costs down. I don't know what it costs for a lawyer in Ohio, but in CA it is between $5-8k for retainer plus hourly. So if you can play nice and are on the same page it won't be as expensive. I don't know how you'll do it without a lawyer if you have a kid though.

    Have you tried MC or anything yet?

  11. #10
    Daffy Duck RedTeamGo!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Cleveland, OH
    Posts
    13,562

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by BuckeyeRed27 View Post
    Sorry to hear it man, I'm going through it right now and honestly it is miserable.

    I don't have kids, so that has made it a lot easier. We are just using a mediator and that has really kept the costs down. I don't know what it costs for a lawyer in Ohio, but in CA it is between $5-8k for retainer plus hourly. So if you can play nice and are on the same page it won't be as expensive. I don't know how you'll do it without a lawyer if you have a kid though.

    Have you tried MC or anything yet?
    I asked if she wanted to see a MC and she said no and that she says everything on her mind.

    I have read that is a big alarm your divorce is inevitably heading towards divorce, the fact one or both of the spouses don't want to work on fixing problems.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by WrongVerb View Post
    BTW, it's going to suck in a lot of ways for awhile when you are back on your own.
    What specifically will suck?

  12. #11
    Member Redsfaithful's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Bexley, OH
    Posts
    7,900

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Worst time is when kids are 0-5. Once you get to school age it gets better.

    Definitely think so long as there's no abuse in a relationship counseling should be considered (and if partner won't go to counseling that's probably a good last straw.)

    Your life will be good and blown up, and she's in your life one way or the other forever now anyway, so it's the kind of thing you want to be sure about.
    Turning and turning in the widening gyre
    The falcon cannot hear the falconer;

  13. Likes:

    Hoosier Red (06-04-2016),Red Heeler (06-05-2016)

  14. #12
    TyrannoSuarez Wrecks WrongVerb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2000
    Location
    Monterey, CA
    Posts
    15,525

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo! View Post
    I asked if she wanted to see a MC and she said no and that she says everything on her mind.

    I have read that is a big alarm your divorce is inevitably heading towards divorce, the fact one or both of the spouses don't want to work on fixing problems.

    - - - Updated - - -



    What specifically will suck?
    For me, even though I wanted out of the marriage, I still spent about a year working through depression and other issues after the split. Beyond that, how you handle your money will be very different. Save as much as you can now, because it gets bad for awhile, especially if you're paying alimony and/or child support. Be ready to downsize your life and try to carry as little debt out of the divorce as possible.
    Gratitude + Forgiveness = Happiness

    Covid to date...
    Total cases: 13,248,924
    New cases yesterday: 108,291
    Total deaths: 269,560
    New deaths yesterday: 1,311

  15. #13
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Cleveland, OH
    Posts
    2,691

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RedTeamGo! View Post
    I asked if she wanted to see a MC and she said no and that she says everything on her mind.

    I have read that is a big alarm your divorce is inevitably heading towards divorce, the fact one or both of the spouses don't want to work on fixing problems.

    - - - Updated - - -



    What specifically will suck?
    I would just be more direct. My wife and I went way to late because we thought the exact same thing. We did end up going and basically figured out that we were in no way both saying what we thought, but the damage had been done so to speak. That said you both obviously have to realize there is a problem and want to work on it 100% and if you don't, than just save you money and start the process.

  16. #14
    You serious Clark? Assembly Hall's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Warsaw, IN
    Posts
    2,240

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by WrongVerb View Post
    For me, even though I wanted out of the marriage, I still spent about a year working through depression and other issues after the split. Beyond that, how you handle your money will be very different. Save as much as you can now, because it gets bad for awhile, especially if you're paying alimony and/or child support. Be ready to downsize your life and try to carry as little debt out of the divorce as possible.
    Very wise words. I would also add health. Depression is one thing, but geez I lost 50 lbs. after mine........and I didn't have it to lose. All I did was drink and pop pills. I could add more to this but I will save it for later. Just hang in there bro..........
    Fake news

  17. #15
    TyrannoSuarez Wrecks WrongVerb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2000
    Location
    Monterey, CA
    Posts
    15,525

    Re: The Divorce Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Assembly Hall View Post
    Very wise words. I would also add health. Depression is one thing, but geez I lost 50 lbs. after mine........and I didn't have it to lose. All I did was drink and pop pills. I could add more to this but I will save it for later. Just hang in there bro..........
    Oh yeah, at the end of that year 2004/2005 I weighed the least I'd weighed since high school, and I haven't been close to that weight since.
    Gratitude + Forgiveness = Happiness

    Covid to date...
    Total cases: 13,248,924
    New cases yesterday: 108,291
    Total deaths: 269,560
    New deaths yesterday: 1,311


Turn Off Ads?

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Board Moderators may, at their discretion and judgment, delete and/or edit any messages that violate any of the following guidelines: 1. Explicit references to alleged illegal or unlawful acts. 2. Graphic sexual descriptions. 3. Racial or ethnic slurs. 4. Use of edgy language (including masked profanity). 5. Direct personal attacks, flames, fights, trolling, baiting, name-calling, general nuisance, excessive player criticism or anything along those lines. 6. Posting spam. 7. Each person may have only one user account. It is fine to be critical here - that's what this board is for. But let's not beat a subject or a player to death, please.

Thank you, and most importantly, enjoy yourselves!


RedsZone.com is a privately owned website and is not affiliated with the Cincinnati Reds or Major League Baseball


Contact us: Boss | GIK | cumberlandreds | Gallen5862 | Kinsm | Plus Plus | Powel Crosley | RedlegJake | The Operator